Mommy Life

Barbara died 10/30/12. She has left behind a loving family and a veritable host of warriors that she has helped and encouraged throughout the years to carry on the fight. We will do our best from this end. Many of you have asked of ways to help. We have set up an account to help with our family's mission and the four Down Syndrome children left behind without their Mama Bear.

As you can see Mother's Day was a hard one for us as I had forecast. On a day where we had always gathered together as a family, we were fragmented....Other children had gone earlier to her graveside and I came later....Daniel had said he wanted to go, but when we got there he lost it and just Jonny, Jesse, Justin and myself went up  on the ridge where Barbara's grave is.....Though it has been six months, the grief is still fresh and actually more real....especially since now we all realize more fully the reality of the loss that death brings.

 We have learned some things as a family over this stretch of ground..... We know it is important to be honest about our pain. It is okay for us to express our lamentations and complaints to God with frankness and honesty...just like David did in the Psalms and Job did....I've learned that as Dr. Paul D. Tripp says, "Grief blocks my ability to see God, but I shouldn't conclude He is absent." Just because we are in the darkness of grief doesn't mean the Son isn't shining.... We've learned to not just look at our life horizontally-----but to look upward... To look at our suffering from His perspective and to understand that each day  we are harvesting what we've sown ourselves before...

Jesus told us in the Gospel of John that "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."  Our time here is short, and we have all been told that grief is not forever...but to receive Our Father's comfort, we need to allow Him to come alongside and shepherd us to Hope.....sometimes that path is dark, treacherous, and filled with sadness.

Something to share with you from Barbara.....She was always asking me to put music on her mp3 player. On her last trip before she died she asked me to put this on for her journey , which I never listened to until after she died....but listening to it now is what she was saying to all of us....

 

Love,

Arrived home today at sunset and took this picture from our mailbox.  Jonny and I had come from Rochester, NY after seeing Ben's recital at Eastman where he is graduating this week with his Masters. This was the same 6 1/2 hr. journey Barbara had taken to come home to us six odd months ago, and then die. Jonny understood this and kept bringing it up and asking, "why Mommy die?"  At one point he said, "wish never been born...maybe Mommy live." I told him that Mommy was so happy that he was her son, like she was of all her daughters and sons. That none of her children were the reason that Mommy died.... that she was happy and grateful for all her children...that she loved and always wanted the best for each one....All along the way, I kept thinking about her last hours on that drive...how she called all her children and myself....filling her time with what was her greatest love and passion...her family.
 
Tomorrow will be a difficult bittersweet day for us... truly we have much to celebrate with the mothers in our family....but we all know that without Barbara and her life, none of this would exist. Amazing what a hole in the fabric that makes up the tapestry of a family one person can leave...To have lost Hattie as well...whose heart's desire was to be a mother, but never had the chance...is devastating.

Milestones continue to be reached with her children and grandchildren...New lives have come into our circle of life...and in spite of our sadness and sometimes despair...we have our Eternal perspective and the comfort of Our Father who has allowed us to feel some of the things He has felt....which is the reality of loss and the finality of death....
On this Mother's Day, I'm sure Barbara would want us to remember the important things....love of God with a longing for Heaven.... the importance of family ties and reconciliation.... the honoring of Mothers....and the gift of life....
Cherish each other always...

In His grip,
Papa Tripp

Love,

Shortly before Barbara died she finished writing this wonderful book.  In many ways,  it is a culmination of her literary life's work. I finished editing it after she left us so suddenly, and am grateful to have this last gift of Barbara's to offer to all of you.

The book is available, as well as so many of her others through our Amazon link located near the top of Mommylife under "Giveaways" on the leftside,  where you'll find this description:

More than ever, if you have children, parenting with purpose is required. In a world where children are bombarded with conflicting messages, both moms and dads must fight the tendency to be reactive and instead proactively become the primary teachers of their children. Raising God-First Kids in a Me-First World addresses media, technology, consumerism, sexual purity, selfishness, and other factors that form children in our society. Curtis empowers parents with the necessary skills to raise kids who are secure in who they are, not basing their worth on society's values. Each chapter includes valuable questions, suggestions, and resources. Topics covered include:

 

    How businesses today are targeting our children with the goal of turning them into consumers, and how we as parents can counteract these forces

    Ways parents can reflect on their own relationship to the media

    Steps to become better role models for our children

    A plan to help children make good choices on their own

 

This book is for parents struggling to help children overcome (while learning to overcome themselves) our inherent self-centeredness--the center-of-the-universe mentality--reinforced ceaselessly by the media and forces of consumerism. Instead, God-first kids are secure in God's love and have learned how to live well from the inside out from the real pros, their parents.

 

All of you... her loving readers made this book possible.  I know she would want me to thank you for your continuing prayers and support as her legacy lives on in our lives and families.

 

In His grip,

Papa Tripp

 

Love,

At 3:01 this morning on this first day of May in the year of Our Lord  2013, Jazz and Nathan welcomed Corban Creed Rodgers into our family.  Our Father is so good to us, when we are still reeling from the losses of Barbara and Hattie... to have orchestrated new lives to be embroidered into the tapestry of our family is such a blessing. Truly Our Father knows and understands how to meet our moments.....in the reality of our lives....
In His grip,
Papa Tripp

Love,

Love,