May 24, 2005 10:12 AM
Mommies: think outside the box!
Yikes! What is it with kids and dirt? The afternoon I discovered our kids had been digging ditches in our back yard, like any mother I started to react in typical fashion. That is, to tell them to stop. Now. Immediately. Forever.
But before I could speak (or scream), they spotted me. And an impromptu celebration began:
“Mommy, mommy, c’mere!â€â€œLook at all this work we’ve done!â€
“I did this one all by myself!â€
“We’re going to do more and then play soldiers!â€
Breathing a silent thank you that I’d been given a reprieve from raining on their parade, I mustered up all the admiration I could for their morning’s work.
And the most amazing thing of all: I wasn’t insincere. Because beyond my initial shock, beyond the upheaval of dirt and grass, I’d caught a glimpse of something transcendent on my children’s faces – like the look adults get when we’ve finished building a bridge or writing a novel or upholstering a chair.
That incredible satisfaction that comes when you know you’ve set out and accomplished something truly worthwhile.
And so instead of destruction, my mommy eyes could see that for children, digging ditches could be as constructive and worthwhile as anything I could have dreamed up for them to do.
First of all, they’d come up with a project on their own. They worked together as a team. Brothers and sisters, older and younger – all had shoveled and spaded and hoed in harmony. As individuals, each had concentrated on a task for a few hours. TV, videos, computer games – all were forgotten as their focus was fixed on meeting a goal. They’d worked hard and they were proud of it.
This is the kind of character-building mommies dream of!
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Maybe my next book should be Everything I Know About Being a Mom, I Learned While My Kids Were Digging Ditches – but for now, let’s just keep it simple:
There are certain things kids need to accomplish that have nothing to do with the work at hand, but the character that’s being built while they’re busy.
You can appreciate the ditches, but it is okay to limit them to one part of the yard so as to maintain your sanity and good relations with your neighbors.
Mommies need to remember to think outside the box. And don’t forget to breathe!
Posted in Mothering | Permalink
Comments
This reminds me of when my first son was about 7, looking out the window; he's dug a hole and filled it with water, revelling in the mud, and singing in him most operatic 7yo voice, "Would He forsake His sacred throne for such a worm as I!"
Posted by: veronique | May 24, 2005 10:57 AM
My kids built a stream and pond last year in a our humble backyard. I learned early on that mud is my friend when dealing with boys! Yesterday afternoon, they spent an hour trying to catch bees with their twin friends (a total of 6 boys in the backyard with various scrounged containers). Funny kids!
Posted by: Mel | May 24, 2005 12:21 PM
That is funny and endearing at the same time. And the first comment is hilarious.
Posted by: Julana Schutt | May 24, 2005 7:52 PM
