November 11, 2005 9:51 AM
Children at Work
A child engaged in his work is a beautiful thing.
In the earliest years, a child longs for meaningful activity - something that will demonstrate his belonging in the group of people who make up his family. Parents who are in tune to this desire and go out of their way to make things possible for their children will reap a rich harvest when their children grow up.
But you must start early and meet the needs during the sensitive periods - the years when the window of opportunity is open. The three-year-old who picks up a broom to sweep is giving you the only cue she can that she is ready to learn. If you take the broom away and wait until she is older, learning will not be the joyful activity it could have been.
I have completed the raising of six of my children now. Still at home are Sophia 15, Maddy 12, and four boys with Down syndrome - Jonny 13, who was my 8th child (Maddy is #9), and Jesse (10), Daniel (9), and Justin (5) who are all adopted sons with Down syndrome.
I am bringing them up the same way I brought up my other kids - it's just that everything takes a little longer!! :) :)
But I thought you might enjoy seeing some pictures of what I mean by kids at work:
When it comes to self-esteem, hours of watching Barney sing "You are special" or similar television brainwashing cannot compare to the solid grounding and sense of belonging and - yes! - self-esteem that comes from feeling that you are a vital part of your family. Give your children every opportunity you possibly can to experience this sense of security and meaning.
The side benefit is that as you rethink your mothering patterns and learn to let your children work side-by-side with you, you will find more joy for your own journey. And as your children get older, there will be a sense of companionship and camaraderie that nothing else can provide.
Blessings on your homes today! And please, if you try something new and it works, leave a comment so we all can enjoy it!
Posted in Big families, Family, Mothering | Permalink
Comments
Such sweet pictures Barbara! Thank you for sharing them!!
Because of your recommendations my 2 and 3 year old have *helped* me vaccuum, put away laundry, sweep floors, do dishes,sey the table, cook dinners, and clear the table, (not in the same day lol, but spread through out a few weeks time) as you had recommended. If they seemed interested, I tried to think of a way to let them help!
And you are SO right! They LOVED it! and the sweet faces of pride and accomplishment are priceless! they aren't done "perfect", but when do I ever do them perfectly LOL?! but less than perfection is so worth them knowing that someone believes in them!
Thank you for writing about this again! I know if I'd hadn't heard you speak on it, I wouldn't have thought to include them in with so much...it's so easy to still see them as our "little babies" when really they are capable of so much!
~Kristy
Posted by: Kristy | November 11, 2005 12:10 PM
With a 16-month-old and a newborn, I don't know how our house would even function if I didn't have my daughter work with me all day. She can push the laundry basket from room to room, hand me things to fold and put away, put the plastics in the cupboard (yeah, it'll be a mess until she masters nesting similar objects, but that's OK), put chopped vegetables in the bowl, and lots more. And she loves it! I do have to think through things to make sure it's safe for her, but I'd have to think a lot harder to think of something to keep her busy and happy while I worked alone. She's learning far more than she could doing the most carefully designed educational activities, too.
Posted by: Queen of Carrots | November 11, 2005 12:44 PM
Queen of Carrots - what a great idea - letting your little one put the chopped veggies in the bowl! I have been looking for something for my 18 month old to do while I cook, besides standing on a chair and watching. So far he has stirred pancake batter and helped me load up the grain mill, but that sounds like another great thing for him to do.
Barbara, thanks for writing about this. I do see the desire to help in my little boy and I am so happy to be able to provide him with activities that he can enjoy and that are helpful (or that will be, as I look toward the future) The things that he loves to do are handing me the clothes to hang when we are hanging clothes to dry (saves my back!), sweeping, and vacuuming, oh and of course trash duty! I look foward to seeing what else he can help with.
Posted by: gwen | November 11, 2005 3:24 PM
I have an 8 y/o son w/DS and frankly he and I love Barney's message and don't consider it brainwashing. Everthing else withstanding...Love what you do for our Kids.
Dan
Posted by: Dan | November 12, 2005 1:16 AM
These are great ideas for getting kids involved and I'm glad to hear some witness to the fact that it brings joy and gladness to our kids.'
Dan,
Thanks for reading and commenting. I think Barney is fine - in fact I even took Jesse to see his show at George Mason because Jesse loves him. However, I think Barney is emblematic of the fact that educators have seen a shortfall in self-esteem in kids and they are trying to patch things up from the outside rather than focusing on the inner developmental and spiritual work that need to take place in the child to create a true foundation
Posted by: barbaracurtis | November 12, 2005 9:08 AM
