April 2, 2006 7:24 AM
More diet discussion
I promised that I would not get one-track about dieting - some of you don't need to hear it and some of you are probably offended. Sally was offended and wrote this comment, which I am moving up here because it may resonate with some readers:
Barbara, this is such a huge topic (no pun intended) that I've hesitated to comment sooner. For one thing I weigh a hundred pounds more now than I did when I got married. So I lack credibility and anything I say might be construed as defensiveness from one who is still blind and has not awakened to the fact that being fat is sinful.However, I do want to say being fat and being gluttonous are not the same thing.
This is why we don't hear a lot of sermons pointing out the sinfulness of being fat, I think. If you have a slow metabolism then why do you say that means you are not allowed to eat what others eat? I don't get that.
Apple pie is tasty but not necessary for anyone. Some people eat it and don't get fat. Others eat and do get fat. Is it a sin for the one with the slow metabolism to eat the apple pie, then? Does God hate fat women or does he hate gluttony? If I eat the same amount as my skinny neighbor and I am fat and she is not, does that make me a glutton?
While I am grossly overweight by anybody's standards, I am healthy. I exercise (strenuously) an average of six hours a week. So what's wrong with being fat? It's considered ugly and man looketh upon the outward appearance. But God looketh upon the heart.
I have dieted and exercised and worked to lose the weight--all because I want to look better. (And all to no avail--I take it off, I pack it on, I take it off, I pack it on) At the same time the pursuit of youth and a youthful figure are sometimes not good. Our obsession with looks is not pleasing to God. A woman's beauty to God is in her willingness to serve, in her reverence to her husband, in her obedience and in the mercy she shows others. The beauty that matters to God, and so the only beauty that matters at all, has nothing to do with a woman's figure.
I hesitate to write this because I know what it's like to hit that plateau after taking off forty pounds and I really don't want to discourage you. And as I said, it's a huge topic and there are a lot of psychological side effects to getting fat and being fat. If you think it's sinful for you to be fat then I really don't want to argue with your conscience.
And yet, I do think it needs to be said that being fat is not a sin for all people.
Now if we refuse to go swimming (or play, or hike, or whatever) with our kids because we are fat, then we are sinning. If we refuse to have sex with our husbands because we feel ugly, then we sin. In those cases we are putting our pride ahead of the needs of others and that is sinful. If we have no energy to serve widows and orphans because we are fat, that too would be sinful. So being fat can contribute to sin. But being fat is not sinful in and of itself, I don't think.
My reply - which may resonate with others:
Sally -
It is a huge topic! I've already written 7,000 words about it for my book - in addition to what I've written here. I'm writing it for people like Nilda and Beckie and Willena and anyone else who's interested in making their next diet their last.
First of all, let me answer these questions:
Does God hate fat women or does he hate gluttony? If I eat the same amount as my skinny neighbor and I am fat and she is not, does that make me a glutton?
No and yes. No, he doesn't hate any of us sinners, no matter how great or stubborn our sin. And yes, eating more than your body can handle is gluttony. Just because my neighbor can eat a huge plateful of food does not mean I am entitled to do the same. Gluttony is "an inordinate desire to consume more than that which one requires" (and by the way, that means not just eating, but using more resources than we really need). If my metabolism is slow and my body requires less food than my neighbor's body, that does not give me license to eat more than my body needs.
(One note of hope for struggling dieters: when you reach your ideal weight, you actually can eat more because your metabolism is back in balance and your body doesn't fight to retain fat. Also, one thing I remind myself when my family's eating pizza and I'm eating a piece of chicken and some unadorned brocolli is "I got myself into this mess and now I have to get myself out." It's my responsibility and no one should feel sorry for me and I don't need to feel sorry for myself.)
I wrote about entitlement mentality here.
Alcoholics cannot drink alcohol because they are wired differently from people who can enjoy alcohol in moderation. People with celiac disease, diabetes, and peanut allergies cannot eat what they want either.
So, yes I do think there is something wrong with my continuing to eat as I please when it causes me to be fat. Other people live with disabilities and limitations. I don't think I'm honoring God when I "have it my way."
I love that verse 1 Samuel 16:7 "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance but the Lord looks at the heart." I use it often when I speak of my sons with Down syndrome. In context, the verse is speaking of outer circumstances that seem impossible to overcome rather than one person's physical appearance. Still, I think it applies to a person who's born with a disability. But there are disabilities - like alcoholism and obesity - that you can get over once you get over your entitlement mentality. Scripture also tells us that with God all things are possible. But we have to be willing.
Being overweight sends a message to the world - and to your family - that you don't care. It is self-indulgent because it means you've put yourself first in this one area - no matter how much you are sacrificing in others. And I say this from the point of view of someone who's been there, done that. Just because a woman's family puts up with her being overweight (remember, we live in a culture with a warped view of tolerance and acceptance), does not mean that they wouldn't be thrilled to see her come out from beneath all those extra layers. And families can form a sick system protecting and enabling the overweight person just like they protect and enable the alcoholic. Here in Virginia we have The Golden Corral - an all-you-can-eat restaurant where you will find many customers who are so fat they cannot get out of their chair to waddle up to get their own food. And you see their family members piling plates and bringing them to them!!!!
As Burger King says, "Have it your way!" When I was growing up, hardly anyone was fat. In the 50's we lived near a highway and there was a McDonald's a mile away. We would save up our money and go there for a meal. They used to advertise "47 cents for a three course meal." The meal was a hamburger, pack of fries and coke - the same size as the kid's meal of today (and those of you who ever frequent McDonalds know they've now come up with a Mighty Kids meal to make sure our kids are on the weight-gaining track). In Indiana last week I saw a billboard advertising a 2/3 pound burger at Hardees. There is something sick and wrong about a culture which continues to think this is acceptable - and we have all been tainted by it. We all feel entitled to eat what we want when we want where we want. One look at the rest of the world should tell us this is wrong. What if we took all the money we were using for food that adds to our overweight condition and put it towards helping a starving child?
I'm sorry - I know this is a touchy subject for readers who are overweight and don't care/aren't ready/feel hopeless. Like you, I was on the Don't Care track for 15 years. No more.
Does this mean I love anyone less because they are overweight? No. All of us sin and fall short. And being prone to overweight is a disability of sorts. However, it is a disability that can be overcome. When I see children with cerebral palsy working so hard to gain enough control to be able to walk or children who are mentally challenged working fifty times harder than a normal kid to learn to count or read, then I wonder why we are satisfied to do less.
A writer has to deliver the message he or she has been given - whether some people like it or not. Isn't the Bible full of people who had to deliver messages no one wanted to hear? If you've been given the message that being overweight is fine, then by all means write about it! But I will say that even in my most stubborn days, I would not have wanted to read a book that would affirm what I knew in my heart was wrong.
Comments
Barbra - You tackle a tough topic with forthright honesty. The other night I was listening to Clark Howard on the radio and a woman called in who was thinking about doing an expensive diet. He told her it sounded like a scam and not to do it. She was then about in tears because she had tried everything else (she felt) and nothing worked for her. It about had me in tears. Especially after some of the nutritional research I have been doing.
Science is now showing low-fat diets to be not only ineffective but damaging to some people's metabolism, because we really need healthy fats for the construction of hormones which regulate metabolism.
I guess I write this because I feel for Sally in that she may have truly tried very hard but given bad diet information. For example, saturated fats are made out to be a demon in most nutritional information, yet I am convinced that they are so important and should make up most of the fats we eat.
Because diet fads come and go and when nutritionists change their minds on what is the right diet every 3 years, I found "The Maker's Diet" really interesting. I really recommend it for those who have tried everything else to no avail. Why can we not turn to God's Word for wisdom on healing and diet? He gave Israel a diet, and it wasn't diet coke and ding-dongs for a reason.
I guess I want to encourage Sally and those who feel frustrated and hopeless like her to keep wrestling with the Lord and even to search His Word and to keep hoping. I agree with what you write about sin and habits, but for some it might take more than self-control. Truly, I think our culture has come so far into a nutritional waste land that many people don't know how to get back out again, even if they are willing.
Posted by: Annie | April 2, 2006 9:15 AM
Annie, I hear you. The reason I'm writing my book is to help fill in the gaps - at least as much as God has been filling them in for me - so that whatever diet a woman goes on can be her last. There are spiritual and emotional issues that must be addressed for the work to have lasting effect. I can see that now.
I agree with you 100 percent about low-fat diets. I have never bought a carton of any kind of milk but whole. We do not use low fat salad dressings or really lowfat anything in our house. None of my kids has a weight problem - including the kids with Down syndrome, who are often prone to that. I have a weight problem because I didn't nip it in the bud. I should have addressed the first 10 pounds. I should not have made excuses for myself because of the number of kids I have. There are women in my church who have 8, 9, 10, 1l kids (I'm the only one with 12, but then I only gave birth to 9). They are in good shape.
But to make things clear, I am not motivated by competition. I am not motivated, as Sally suggested, by an obsession with appearance or a pursuit of youthfulness.
I am simply convicted that being fat is a disability that can be overcome. I am motivated by a desire to please God in EVERY area of my life. I am motivated by a desire to bless my family. I am motivated by somehow finally coming out of denial and realizing it is the right thing to do.
Again, I'm going to draw on the comparison to alcoholism. Why do we make excuses for ourselves and others who are overweight? After doing a google on gluttony this morning and looking up references, I am even more convicted. God made food to meet our needs, not our desires. If we have let our condition go on so long that we are grossly overweight - I myself started with 100 pounds to lose and have lost 37 so far - then it's our responsibility and we must suffer through whatever it takes to shed it.
How can Christians expect a young, frightened, confused nonbelieving teenage girl to forego an abortion and sacrifice to carry a baby for 9 months to give it up for adoption if we can't pull ourselves up by the boostraps and say, "Look. I did this to myself. I ate more than I should have many, many, many times. It will take a long time to take the resulting weight off. But with God's help, I can do this."
Posted by: barbaracurtis | April 2, 2006 11:07 AM
I'm finding your writing on this topic helpful, even though by outward appearances I'm one of those "skinny neighbors" who can eat the apple pie and not gain weight. I've never had a problem with gluttony and don't eat large portions though.
BUT, I'm interested in your writing because I believe I have struggles with unwise and even sinful attitudes behind my food choices nonetheless. I believe this is an issue for most of us... regardless of our weight- especially in our society today.
The big wake up call for me was when I found out I had gestational diabetes with my third pregnancy. I had *none* of the risk factors and was shocked.
That's when I got serious about my eating and realized how far off I was. No, I wasn't overeating donuts and chips and pop. But I was eating mostly carbs and very little fruits, veggies, and healthy proteins compared to what I should be.
I was eating towards taste gratification instead of what was healthy. (Like snacking on some cinammon graham crackers instead of on a healthy alternative like an apple and some almonds.)
As a result, I was satisfying my hunger in unwise ways and not eating what I should have been.
It was so enlightening to have to monitor my blood sugar and see what put me over the edge. I was shocked as even foods that were seemingly "not too bad" would have a bad effect. (Who would have thought a few Saltine crackers would be a problem- but they were!)
Americans today consume WAY to many unhealthy carbohydrates in proportion to healthy carbs, proteins and fruits and veggies. I've been reading some of the same things as Annie (Nourishing Traditions) and also believe that our culture today is woefully uninformed on what a healthy diet should really look like.
Posted by: Anne | April 2, 2006 12:03 PM
I wanted to add, that in a way I'm thankful for getting gestational diabetes (though I pray I never, ever get the real thing!)
God has used it to challenge my underlying assumptions and pride over not being overweight.
I was somewhat stuck (and still struggle with) that "have it my way" mentality and didn't think it was a problem because I wasn't consuming more calories than I expended. But as Barabara says, that attitude is NOT honoring to God. Fat or thin.
Posted by: Anne | April 2, 2006 12:07 PM
I just wanted to add that the one thing that really, really helped me in losing weight was: WRITING DOWN EVERYTHING I PUT IN MY MOUTH! When you write down everything, and I mean EVERYTHING you eat or drink, you soon realize just exactly how much is being eaten! I was surprised, to say the least! That was a huge motivating factor in my weight loss. Hope this helps someone!!
Posted by: Kathy | April 2, 2006 3:24 PM
Ouch, Barbara. You're speaking the truth in love. Go girl.
Posted by: Holly | April 2, 2006 6:57 PM
Recently I've learned the freedom that comes with confessing my sin in regards to eating. By confessing, I mean "agreeing with God" about my habits and thoughts. We humans tend to think freedom comes with the denial of sin, i.e. if I can convince myself and others that what I'm doing is a disease or a lifestyle choice or whatever else, then I will have freedom from guilty feelings. However, the Bible tells us that only the truth will set us free. And the truth is that if I'm using my body in a way that satisfies my desires (lusts) rather than acknowledging that it belongs to God and practicing good stewardship . . . well, then I'm sinning. This is true whether I'm 50 pounds overweight with uncontrolled eating habits or if I'm a physically-fit athlete who pushes her body to an unhealthy extreme in order to win a prize.
The good news is that the Bible has a remedy for sin. God doesn't give us power over disease or lifestyle choices, but He does give us power over sin through the death and resurrection of His Son and through the indwelling of his Holy Spirit in the life of the believer. Agreeing with God about my eating habits has revolutionized my diet. And, oh the FREEDOM! My diet is more restricted, but I'm free from the power food held over me!!
A book that has really helped me in this area is "Love to Eat, Hate to Eat" by Elyse Fitzpatrick. I have also appreciated reading what you have to say, Barbara. Praise God for the victory He gives us!
Posted by: Jodi | April 2, 2006 10:19 PM
my favorite part was when you said earlier that bankers handle money everyday and even if they are broke they can't take any home with them. My husband is a banker so I felt you were talking to me (even if we aren't broke, it works) Now, when I give the boys cereal for breakfast I enjoy my hot lemon water instead of eating a box of cereal (I didnt do that every day but I sure could! I love cereal!!)
Thanks for your words, Barbara. It is hard when you try and try and the weight stays. I am happy to say I am 5 pounds less and plan on doing the same tomorrow thanks to you and my husband.
Posted by: janet | April 2, 2006 10:53 PM
Dear Barbara,
I have been reflecting on your post all day. It is the first time anyone has said this to me! And I do think it is for me! My wedding ring is so snug, it's painful, and my clothing choices are so limited each day (though the closet is full) as I continue to grow out of everything.
I agree with you that we have to start recognizing overeating as sin. The world gives us so very many excuses for this particular sin, and too often I actually believe them! (It's just my body type! I deserve to eat this!) Still, for a long time now, I have known it is the biggest sin in my life, and that it causes me to sin in other ways too. (not caring about my appearance, laziness, wallowing in my pity party, etc.)
I think it's not really addressed in the church because how we eat is so connected to who we are. i.e., We can listen to a sermon about another sin, like sexual immorality, and most people in the congregation won't really know exactly who is struggling most with sexual sins. If overeating were to be addressed, it would be obvious who that sermon was for.(me) And it would not be easy for me to endure that kind of sermon in public! (Though I do need to hear it, as I learned from your post!)
I can't think of another sin, other than serious drug abuse, that would so transform your body as to make you wear that sin all of the time, so that everyone who looks at you knows what you're guilty of. (And overeating leads to feel guilty all the time: walking into a room, look in the mirror, etc.) The point is, at church we won't accept a Christian's abuse of drugs or alcohol(we'd hound that person night or day to quit, get help etc.)but if one of us is abusing food, it isn't mentioned. It's too personal to mention because if I am overweight that is the me I project to others, that is who I am. At my church many, maybe most of us are overweight.
I am so glad you are writing about this topic. As far as I am concerned, you can write about it every day. Nothing in me is offended other than the sinful flesh I've been hanging onto! And I think the blog is the perfect place to do it in order to save everyone public embarrassment (we don't need anymore embarrassment!) and yet speak the truth in love: you can't go on and not address this sin that will damage your life on so many levels.
And congrats to you for giving this to God and allowing Him to have victory over the mistakes made! You have inspired me so much to get my life right too. Thank you so much for this BLOG!
Posted by: Stacie | April 3, 2006 12:19 AM
Barbara, thanks so much for tackling this discussion.
First, please know that I am not offended at all by your take on the fat/sin question. I disagree with you on this issue but I have been reading here for months and I have a great deal of respect for you. Nothing you've ever said has offended me. I post on blogs and bulletin boards all the time and I read you regularly so I guess I forgot that though I feel like I know you, you don't know me. I should have spoken more carefully and made clear that I was not offended.
Secondly, I didn't mean to imply that you are pursuing weight loss because you are obsessed with looks--that comment was about my motives for dieting and about society's obsession with youth/health/looks. There is a point were diet can become an idol and I think that it is not necessarily wrong for a person to say, "I'll be happy maintaining my weight and I don't want to focus time, money, and energy on losing weight right now." That line of thought does not automatically mean a person is uncaring, or gluttonous.
Thirdly, I am not feeling hopeless, by any means. You are closer to the truth when you put me in the "don't care" category. Though the truth is that I struggle with not caring. I do care because I think people who don't know me well look at me and see a lazy/stupid/gluttonous person. That bothers me. I'd like others to see a bright/hardworking/generous person. So I struggle to make myself not care and I remind myself that I am living Coram Deo and what others think of me doesn't change how God feels about me. Nor do the opinions of people who don't know me present an accurate view of myself. The opinions of strangers should not affect me either positively or negatively. I am more sinful in some areas than any of you could know and I am probably less sinful in other areas than many would suspect.
My reason for writing is not personal. I am not here to defend myself but to argue a point that I think is important to consider, especially as you are going to write a book about this. That point is that obesity and gluttony are not synonymous.
Do you think that it is always wrong to desire more than your body requires?
Because if it is then anyone who eats a slice of apple pie is a glutton. No one's body needs apple pie. No one's body needs white sugar. No one's body needs processed flour. We don't need red meat or grapes or pork or strawberries. We could all live on soy beans. If it is a sin to desire something your body does not require then my skinny children sin when they eat pizza.
So my point is that if we define gluttony as "desiring and eating more than you need" then we are all guilty of gluttony.
On the other hand, if we define gluttony as "eating more calories than you burn" then only people who are gaining weight are guilty of gluttony.
And if we go further and define gluttony as "eating more than will allow you to lose weight if you're overweight" then fat people who are not gaining but not losing are guilty of gluttony. (and who defines overweight? Hollywood, the insurance companies, or the South American men who like women with a little meat on their bones? Because God never defined it as far as I can remember.)
I think none of those definitions are biblical.
In Deuteronomy 21:20 and Proverbs 23:21 the word "glutton" is used and Strong's gives this definition:
1) to be worthless, be vile, be insignificant, be light
2) to make light of, squander, be lavish with
3) to shake, tremble, quake
In the New Testament Jesus is accused of being gluttonous and that Greek word is defined by Strong as being "a voracious man." A greedy man, who devours or craves food in great quantities, in other words.
I am not convinced that all fat people are guilty of this. I'm not even convinced that most fat people are guilty of this. I know many fat people who are not greedy and who don't devour food in great quantities.
There is much that you say that I agree with. The entitlement deal is huge. I am guilty of that in several areas. My husband is a quadriplegic and I have used that hardship as an excuse to take rests when God has not told me to rest. So I really like what you have to say about entitlement. I also agree with your belief that being fat constitutes a disability. A self-imposed disability, in many cases. One of the reasons I exercise, even though I hate the time it takes away from other pursuits, is that I'm afraid that if I don't I will end up driving around the store in one of those little carts because I'm too heavy for my ankles. So I'm not saying that you shouldn't address this subject and you shouldn't say hard things. I'm all for hard truths.
I simply don't think it's true that we can look at a person's body and decide he's a glutton. I think we have to look at a person's eating and drinking and time-spending habits to determine if he's a glutton or not. We can't look at a man with lung cancer and decide he was a smoker and we can't look at a divorced woman and take that as evidence that she was an unsubmissive wife. Smoking does cause cancer sometimes. Being unsubmissive causes divorce sometimes. Gluttony causes fatness sometimes. But we can't look at the end and determine the means in these cases.
Posted by: sally apokedak | April 3, 2006 1:57 AM
Thanks everyone for the discussion.
Sally, I really think you're straining. I hate this kind of word-mincing and it's one of the reasons I avoid theological discussions. Sometimes people can't see the forest for the trees.
The fact is, I am writing about my experience and my realizations. Yes, I think overweight people are guilty og gluttony. Period. If you put more into your system than you need, then you will gain weight. The time to stop is at the first 5 or 10 pounds when your metabolism hasn't become completely messed up like ours has.
It's not that I'm going to go around hating people who are overweight. If you've read here a while you know that I've preached against hating homosexuals, etc.
You said: Do you think that it is always wrong to desire more than your body requires?
I don't believe that desires in and of themselves are wrong as long as we don't entertain them. Entertaining them can lead to acting on them and it's actions that are right and wrong. So entertining them is wrong too because we know where they might lead.
The discipline for overeating starts the same place as for any sexual sin - a thought comes into your mind and you whisk it out immediately. I believe there are people whose wiring or early experience does cause them to struggle with sexual orientation. They may struggle with it all their lives. But some of them realize that acting on it is a sin. Others who say they are Christians board a bus and tour college campuses to convince everyone that their sin is not a sin. They also mince words and have lots of proof texts from the Bible.
I am not going to spend my time justifying the results of my own sin by looking for excuses or rationalizations. I simply want to be free.
You said Thirdly, I am not feeling hopeless, by any means. You are closer to the truth when you put me in the "don't care" category. Though the truth is that I struggle with not caring. I do care because I think people who don't know me well look at me and see a lazy/stupid/gluttonous person. That bothers me. I'd like others to see a bright/hardworking/generous person. So I struggle to make myself not care and I remind myself that I am living Coram Deo and what others think of me doesn't change how God feels about me. Nor do the opinions of people who don't know me present an accurate view of myself. The opinions of strangers should not affect me either positively or negatively.
It does matter what others think - especially when there is truth in it. I'm taking respnsibility for that in my life. Even if I didn't care - which I didn't for years, and which I, like you, had to struggle with - being overweight is a stumbling block. I am not as effective a messenger as I could be if people didn't have to look past my weight to respect what I am saying. Anything that interferes with my message-bearing capability is something I should address if it is within my power - no matter the sacrifice required. After all, Jesus sacrificed everything for me.
I agree that lots of fat people are kind, generous, extra loving etc. But I also know that they can use their extra kindness to allow themselves one little corner of the universe where they feel justified in being self-indulgent. I know because that is me. "I've adopted these extra kids. I deserve . . . Blah. Blah. Blah."
As I said, the time the ball started rolling on my overeating sin was when I gained the first 10 pounds and didnt lose it. It's my fault that my metabolism is slow now and that I have to go to extraordinary measures to lose weight.
Yesterday I took my girls shopping and while waiting for them in the dressing room I sat down in a chair, then caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Yuck! And I thought I was getting thin because I've lost 37 pounds! I was so offended by the image I saw. But glad that my self-image is finally coming around to reality, because I know it wasn't. I thought I was fat when I was thin and I pretended I was thin when I was fat.
I am only more motivated than ever to continue losing weight until I am the owner of the body God had in mind when he designed me. I just know this is the right thing to do.
Posted by: barbaracurtis | April 3, 2006 6:42 AM
Barbara thanks for posting and responding to the discussions in this post and your concluding remarks. I am sure you are going to write a very helpful encouraging book on weight loss. I want the road less traveled! I am printing this post for further thought, self examination, and incentive to do what I can today toward taking care of myself responsibly. Don't take forever on that book :). Thanks.Pam
Posted by: Pam | April 3, 2006 1:31 PM
Thank you for baring your soul to us Barbara... I'm so encouraged by your honesty to take a hard honest look at myself & the way I have been treating the body that the Lord gave me. I know that it is a rebellious streak in me that refuses to eat whole foods (fruits, veggies, whole grains ...) I'm reading "Greater Health Gods Way" Stormie Omartian! It encourages over all wellness. I am going to lay down my pride and 50 plus pounds and start making healthy choices for me and my family~ Praise God his mercies are new every morning.
Posted by: Angie H | April 3, 2006 5:53 PM
All I can say is WOW! These are amazing posts on this topic....and obviously VERY close to the heart for many of us...myself included. We really SHOULD be challenging each other in this. Those of us who don't struggle with "OBVIOUS" sins of immorality or addictions or "blatant" sins that are "named" in the Bible and think we are any less guilty....my sin...my indulgence...my addiction to food, to overeating, to sweets, to unending TREATS...is no less grievous to the Lord than the person addicted to porn or hustling on a street corner or addicted to crack...and we in the church who refuse to acknowledge our overeating as sin and pile our plates at every pot luck fellowship are ignoring the log in our own eyes. We really need a lot less food than we think. We've been fed so much contadictory information about what is a"proper balanced" diet none of us really knows what is true any more. We really need to let the Holy Spirit in and convict us about our eating what is healthy, normal and acceptable and what is overindulging.
Thanks Barbara for not holding back...believe me even as I write I am struggling with it, having eaten one more bowl of soup than necessary...just because it was there and needed to be finished and noone else was eating it.
And as I think of it...the issue really cannot be separated from our level of activity. Some of us are way more "inactive" than we think we are or ought to be, thus burning less cals than we ingest....and that may be called "laziness/slothfulness". My sin of "inactivity" (even though I am a mother of 6, soon to be 7) mixed with my sin of over-indulgence in food...makes for quite overweight me. If it is gluttony or laziness or slothfulness or all of the above, then I better deal with it!
Posted by: Tara | April 4, 2006 2:52 PM
I love this discussion too
Tara, I had to laugh at what you said: I think lots of my extra weight came from poor impulse control here - just couldn't bear to throw away food.
I really appreciate everyone's comments - and yours especially Sally as they helped me anticipate objections and firm up my position.
Posted by: barbaracurtis | April 4, 2006 3:49 PM
"I really appreciate everyone's comments - and yours especially Sally as they helped me anticipate objections and firm up my position."
LOL Well, I'm always glad to be of service, Barbara.
I also enjoyed the discussion.
Posted by: sally apokedak | April 4, 2006 4:16 PM
I have read and reread your post over the past couple of days, because it has truly resonated within me. I feel a bit of affirmation for how I have been feeling about my own eating habits. I too came to the realization that I was my biggest problem. My laziness and self indulgence.
I just wanted to thank you for putting it all into words. And the comments of everyone else here, letting me know I am not the only one. That reassurance alone helps me in my commitment to myself and my children. Thanks again. theresa
Posted by: theresa | April 4, 2006 6:41 PM
I think you have shared some great insights, Barbara. But I don't think Sally is really "straining" when she attempts to biblically define gluttony. I think she brings up a very valid and important point. And I think that there is also room for remembering that there are "seasons" for things. I am not as experienced a mother as you are, but I have had four children in the last four years. While I make very careful, informed choices about what we eat, I still have about 40 pounds to lose. It is not easy to exercise when you have such little ones, but I am working on it! However, I think it IS selfish and sinful of me to want to either -- 1) take time away from the necessaries of life (family worship, laundry, meals, dishes, diapers, reading w/ kids), which do take ALL DAY due to constant interruptions; or 2) take time away from being with my husband in the evening -- in order to exercise madly. I just have to realize that now is not the time for me to be skinny, but there will be a time when things slow down and I can work on it. And it would be very frustrating to me to have an elder from my church come and say, "You really look like you're dealing with gluttony." I guess I'm just trying to add that I agree with Sally that being overweight does not instantly point to gluttony. My chief end is to be glorifying God and enjoying Him forever. My food choices and time choices need to be towards this end.
Posted by: covenantmama | April 6, 2006 10:41 AM
dear covenantmama -
People who know me well know I would never add unecessarily to a young mother's burden. Myy own experience, though, is that it has been 13 years since my last baby and i was 100 pounds overweight. No excuses can take away the fat that i ate more calories than my body could consume. That is bad stewardship and poor leadership. It is not a question of vanity. And I do feel that we glorify God by not being self-indulgent in ANY area of our lives. This is where I am right now with mine and because I am a weriter, I write about it. It resonates with those God has prepared to receive this particular message. And I will repeat: gluttony is consuming more than we need in any area of our lives.
Posted by: bisarbaracurt | April 6, 2006 7:14 PM
It is true that being overweight does not instantly point to gluttony. I have learned an amazing thing in the past year or so. No matter how careful I am being... no matter how meticulously I count calories... eating wheat will make the scales shoot up dramatically in just a few days. That is no exaggeration. I can gain 20 lbs. in four days just by eating buns and pasta, and it will disappear just as quickly when I eliminate them. Even fluid retention doesn't account for such a dramatic weight gain and loss. Eating wheat or sugar also causes a spike in insulin levels, for they are high on the glycemic index. This in turn causes a craving for more, more, more.
This obviously isn't a problem for everyone, at least to that extent, but I suspect it is a problem for more people than we realize. For me, it has meant taking a hard look at my attitude toward my favourite foods, and consider them in a different light. It used to be that *overindulging* in wheat and sugar caused a weight gain. Now it's *indulging* in them causes not only weight gain, but a host of health issues for me... things which affect my whole family because of mood swings, inability to cope, and mental fog, all of which prevent me from fulfilling my God-given responsibilities. Indulgence in my favourite foods has become a violation of the sixth commandment in a different way.
The diet Barbara is on eliminates wheat, sugar and dairy, while focusing on vegetables low on the glycemic index, fruit, meat and eggs, drinking plenty of fluids, exercising and getting enough sleep. Later other healthy choices are added, such as yogurt, cheese and veggies like squash and yams. It's a well-balanced diet with a wide variety of choices. I find it very satisfying, and the weight is melting off. Best of all, I am beginning to feel much better again.
Posted by: Willena | April 7, 2006 2:02 PM
