August 11, 2006 9:51 AM
Another reason I love Virginia - or How Sophia got her License
I love Virginia. Especially after 30 years of living in California with all the "freedom" that so captivated me in the 70's and 80's - which was really all about freedom from morality and traditional values, not true political freedom at all.
While that was originally what drew this hippie chick to San Francisco, my views on everything changed in 1987 when we became Christians. Also there's nothing like building your own business to make even the most counterculture fanatic question the role of government. In California, the government really does play Big Brother, regulating everything from whether you can keep disinfectant in employee bathrooms to teaching kids in kindergarten that boys can wear dresses and marry other boys when they grow up.
Yet for all its over attention to the details of people's daily lives, California neglects important aspects of the infrastructure. Communities are not well-planned, schools are dilapidated, secondary roads are poorly maintained.
By contrast, when we moved to Virginia, we were in awe at the beautiful schools and well-maintained roads. It is so obvious that tax money is better spent in this state - less to useless layers of bureaucracy and more on the things that matter to citizens.
Yet there is attention to detail where it matters. Witness how the state handles granting driver’s licenses to teens.
Teens here must put in the usual drivers’ ed course in school, then pass the written test at the DMV for a learner’s permit. This is followed by 40 hours of documented behind-the-wheel instruction with a parent, then 10 hours with a professional driving instructor who is authorized to grant or deny them a license at the end of that training. And this is no rubber-stamp operation: one of my kids didn’t get a license automatically, but was required to take more hours before the instructor saw the finished product he was looking for.
Though the teen may then drive without a parent, the process still isn’t final. Periodically, the Juvenile and Domestic Relations Court holds a ceremony in which teens are officially granted their license. Parents and teens receive their notice to attend and to dress appropriately for court. Sophia and I were scheduled for the ceremony yesterday.
Because of the rapid growth of Loudoun County, the ceremony has been moved from an actual court room to Heritage High School. It is a truly unique experience to see 200 parent/teen couples – and no one else except a judge, a bailiff and a couple speakers – all in one place. As we waited to be invited into the school auditorium, I enjoyed searching for family resemblances. As one of our speakers later said, if you lined up all the parents on one side of the room and all the kids on the other, you would have no trouble matching them.
Even though we were in a school auditorium, the bailiff announced, “All Rise!†as Judge Jacob took the stairs to the podium on the stage. A few in the audience – including me – had been there before with older kids, but for many this would be new. I hoped they had brought their handkerchiefs.
Judge Jacob stressed first of all that driving is a privilege, not a right. In this age of entitlement mentality, that is always a good message for teens – and adults – to hear.
Then Mr. Plowman, our Commonwealth Attorney for Loudoun County (Virginia is proud to be a commonwealth rather than a state, but I’m still not exactly clear on what that means – will have to Google someday when I have more time), spoke. He started with a personal story of his own cocky attitude when he got his license – When will these people shut up and give me my license? – and his totaled car two months later. He produced a huge steel pin that had replaced his femur for over a year as his mended leg repaired itself.
He told the kids “Congratulaions! You have worked hard and made it through to obtain a label: High Risk.†But he assured them that by becoming good drivers, they could earn their way out of that category. He explained the high risk factors, focusing especially on how we are way too comfortable in our cars and often distracted by other things.
He also mentioned that Loudoun has the largest deer population, although he neglected to say whether that was in our state or county. In Loudoun, 7000 deer were killed by hunters, 2000 were hit by cars, and yet we still had 10,000 left. Amazing. At one point he asked everyone who had struck a deer or been struck by a deer to stand and one third of us stood. If this sounds terrible to readers, it is. You can be driving very carefully at night and have a deer just jump right into the front or side of your car. Mating season is especially crazy around here.
The next speaker was Joyce Guthrie, a mom whose son was killed in a crash about two miles from our house a year before we moved here. They are a lovely homeschooling family and Josh was the second of 8 kids. That the crash happened on a Sunday afternoon as Josh and his sister were returning from helping at a Washington DC shelter, that it took place just a quarter mile from their house, and that Mrs. Guthrie – a former trauma nurse who runs out to help in any accidents on that dangerous strip of road – was one of the first on the scene, that it was covered on the news and we all saw the story and the pictures – well, let’s just say it is a dramatic and emotional story.
Since Josh’s death, Mrs. Guthrie has attended every license ceremony to deliver her message. She has every teen/parent couple hold hands and look into each others’ eyes for several minutes, then say "I love you," then look into ean others' eyes some more and say, “I promise to be a good driver.†She begs everyone to remember this commitment every time they turn the key in the ignition.
It is powerful, and so very very sad. There is something about mothers who have lost a child. They just look different and you know that the pain is with them every day. As Mrs. Guthrie said, it’s not just on birthdays and holidays that you remember. It’s every day.
Judge Jacob closed by explaining why the Virginia legislature had set up the licensing ceremony: to help teens understand the enormity of what they were doing. She went over laws regarding suspension of licenses, especially emphasizing alcohol-related offenses. Did you know that although teens make up only 7.4% of drivers, they are responsible for 50% of all alcohol-related accidents?
She also explained that when the teens traded in their learner’s permits for their driver’s licenses, the license would be handed to their parents, as it was through the parents that the privilege was being bestowed. In Virginia, a parent can revoke the license of a child under 18 at any time for any reason – no questions asked. As Judge Jacob said, in case any parent missed the point, this can be an effective tool for requiring good behavior.
You would certainly never see or hear anything like this in California, where the state does its best to usurp parental authority and a school nurse is legally permitted to take your daughter to an abortion clinic without you even knowing it! Imagine if a parent even suggested that his child’s license be revoked. . . .The parent would probably be admonished for infringing on his child’s civil liberties.
It was a milestone for Sophia, although Virginia keeps a tight rein on teen drivers – for the first year only one other passenger in the car other than family members and adult drivers. Also curfew between midnight and 4am.
I was happy that Sophia had the right attitude about everything. She has certainly thrived in this more conservative atmosphere, and really grown up this year. She is so responsible and has such a good head on her shoulders. I can’t imagine her ever having an accident. But then neither could Mrs. Guthrie imagine her Joshua.
Just another reminder that we need to make the most of every moment we’re here, to cherish each other while we’re together this side of heaven.
Posted in Family, Loudoun County | Permalink
Comments
What an encouraging story, Mrs. Barbara. I have heard for years about how much easier it was to raise decent kids back when the culture was a help, not a deterrent. This certainly shows what a blessing wisely applied social pressure can be to young people and their parents (and society).
Posted by: Cheri | August 11, 2006 10:51 AM
Wow! Makes me want to giddy-up and move there... My sisters and their families are in the Richmond area, but still have very young children, so they may not be aware of this very cool ceremony.
I wonder if the gravity of driving when presented this way makes for more careful drivers? Sounds as if it would. Are there statistics available? My sisters and I all were involved in major car accidents within the first two years after we started driving. That for me is what made me more careful (and even a little gun shy).
If only states a little further south would implement such wonderful programs. I never see my husband willing to go much farther north than TN (and even that is a maybe...he really likes the mild winters).
=) Phyllis in FL
Posted by: Phyllis | August 11, 2006 11:06 AM
Wow! I love everything about that process!
Makes me want to move to VA, too...
Posted by: miller_schloss | August 11, 2006 1:25 PM
Add me to another on the list wanting to move!! Anyone know of any Air Force Bases in Virginia? *grins*
Posted by: Kristy | August 13, 2006 2:58 AM
I just love google! I was trying to find if there were any sort of ceremonies for teens receiving their drivers license. I had a friend years ago that spoke of a "ceremony" that occured in her church whenever one of the youth got their license, and I was trying to find something like that. I would love to suggest something like that to the elders in my church. I never knew about Virginia....amazing.
Posted by: Connie | August 25, 2006 2:50 PM
