October 26, 2006 8:51 AM
Starbucks
There's an episode of The Simpsons (yes, I used to watch the Simpsons - for why I think it's got some things going for it, see my article here) where Bart, while walking through the Springfield Mall, passes several Starbucks, then goes into a store called "In and Out Piercing."
Employee: Can I help you?Bart: I'd like to get my ear pierced.
Employee: Well, better make it quick, kiddo. In five minutes this place is becoming a Starbucks.
Bart gets his ear pierced, and as he leaves, sure enough - like all of the other stores above and around it, the piercing store is instantly transformed into Starbucks.
That's what I love about comedy. I could write a 1000 word essay on the porliferation of Starbucks, like this:
Starbucks pursues aggressive expansionSeattle, October 25, Breitbart
The people who work in Seattle's tallest building face a tough decision: should they get their caffeinated indulgence at the old Starbucks on the building's first floor or the new Starbucks, 40 floors up? And, if those lines are too long, is it too far to walk across the street, where a third Starbucks awaits?. . . .
While Starbucks knows there's plenty to lure people into their stores, they also recognize that many people can't be bothered to walk very far _ or wait very long _ for an optional and pricey treat.
"Going to the other side of the street can be a barrier," said Launi Skinner, senior vice president in charge of Starbucks' store development.
. . . .Starbucks adds a whopping six stores a day on average. . .
In Vancouver, Canada, such planning has meant adding stores on either side of a busy intersection. In New York, there are two Starbucks in one Macy's, as well as two in the 49-story Marriott Marquis hotel.
Starbucks also is flooding some smaller cities. In Spokane, Wash., two Starbucks sit across from each other in a strip mall and a grocery store, close enough that baristas could toss pounds of coffee beans at one another if they wanted to.
But executives say one main complaint they hear from customers is that Starbucks isn't convenient enough. Starbucks customers don't want to go too far out of their way to get their morning latte or afternoon pick-me-up. And once they have stepped into their vehicles, they don't want to bother to undo their seat belts for a caffeinated treat, either _ hence the explosive growth of Starbucks drive-throughs.
For full article, go here.
I could repeat what I wrote after Tripp and I went to New York for a few days the summer before last:
“On the left is the Starbucks for this block,” our guide noted wryly now and then. And it was true – in the busiest parts of town there was a Starbucks on every corner.“How many in all?” I asked.
“One hundred seventeen. And 109 McDonalds,” he said. And that was just the 22 square miles of Manhattan.
[Keep in mind that that figure was from July 2005, so there are undoubtedly many, many more today.]
I could mention that McLean Bible Church, which is about 40 minutes east of us has a real Starbucks in its downstairs lobby. Maybe you people out in Texas are used to this sort of thing, but I was amazed the first time I saw it.
And it would take you quite a while to get the point that a comedy writer made in less than a minute.
And what to say about our American culture where we feel entitled to such convenience that a chain can make money opening stores across the street from each other? How decadent is that?
Comments
Don't tell anyone, but I watch the Simpsons too.
And I'm from Seattle, where all the Starbucks hullaballoo started. I recently posted at the CAN blog a reaction to an article in the Seattle Times about Starbucks' unusual marketing. You can find my blog entry here:
http://canblog.typepad.com/canbookmarketing/2006/10/marketing_starb.html#more
Posted by: relevantgirl | October 26, 2006 10:52 AM
"I've seen the end of the universe. And it happens to be in the United States. And oddly enough, it's in Houston, Texas. I know, I was shocked, too. Imagine my surprise when I left the comedy club one day and walked to the end of the block. And there on one corner was a Starbucks, and across the street from that Starbucks, in the exact same building as that Starbucks, there was a Starbucks. I looked back and forth thinking the sun was playing tricks with my eyes. But there was a Starbucks across from a Starbucks. And that my friends, is the end of the universe." Lewis Black. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddG_BTWee4Q)
The funniest thing about that skit was that about 6 years ago, before I ever heard it, I used to patronize the Starbucks on the right. ;) I was a customer when they built the second Starbucks, and we all thought it was hilarious. According to the employees we talked to the original plan was to close the first store after the second one was open -- it was supposed to be a move across the street, not a second store. But once they opened they got so much business in both stores that they left both open. Maybe that's where they got the idea!
Posted by: Michelle | October 26, 2006 4:47 PM
If my estimitation of construction progress is accurate, our neighborhood starbucks will be open before Christmas. It's 0.6 miles from our house, and I could literally stroll there with my baby, I mean toddler, instead of drive, since the adjoining neighborhood is behind the Kroger that is behind the starbucks. Anyway, a recent news story discussed the # of calories in Starbucks' drinks... ugh. If I do give into temptation, I'd better walk so I don't put on the post-pregnancy pounds that I can't seem to get rid of.
Posted by: Lauren | October 26, 2006 10:29 PM
Starbucks ain't just everywhere in the States, I can get my double defroth macholatte with room to go on pretty much every corner in London too, and most of the smaller towns in the UK!! Still, now I know where they hide the sugar (cream, flavours, every bit of food) and can get round that I still prefer it to a Macdonalds on every corner!! x
Posted by: Claire | October 27, 2006 3:46 AM
I read recently that Starbucks intends to DOUBLE their current US presence. I am all for business growth but it's TOO much. My husband carpools with one of his soldiers from our small town in Purcellville (which presently is Starbucks-free) all the way to Ft Myer (which is 50 miles each way). And they often stop at Starbucks.
My husband is off of caffeine thanks to the FF Plan and he got the shakes REALLY bad one morning after drinking some coffee drink with something like 1200 calories.
He quickly realized:
1) the dangers of the slippery slope of sugar and caffeine,
2) the COST of that morning habit ($4 each day x 3 days = $48 per month which translates to almost $600 per year!) which happens to be the cost of a new tool.
I don't want Starbucks in our small town.
Too much is just that. TOO MUCH.
Posted by: suzanne | October 27, 2006 8:53 AM
Yikes, I actually wish there was a Starbucks nearby. My husband and I discovered one in a Target store 30 minutes away and we loved having a cheap date there. I don't live in the middle of nowhere or anything, but there are no coffee shops nearby!
If they are so easy to start, maybe we can help get one started across the street from us. lol...
Posted by: Shannon | October 27, 2006 10:08 PM
The sad thing is...I am of the understanding that Starbucks is a promoter of the Homosexual agenda and also Planned Parenthood. The "fellowship" my church belongs to sold Starbucks coffee at their annual summer CHRISTIAN "Family" camp last year...Are we using God's money to support companies that sponsor anti-family, anti-life and anti-biblical marriage agendas?
Check out this article at WorldNetDaily:
http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=45694
Posted by: Tara | October 30, 2006 12:00 AM
