April 22, 2007 4:17 PM
Building future heroes
One thing that's been on my mind about the Virginia Tech massacre is why the students were so passive. I'm not being disrespectful here, but trying to ask a very real question. What has happened to American heroism? The only hero I've heard of so far is the 77-year-old Holocaust survivor who tried to keep the door shut while the students escaped from the windows.
But why didn't any of the guys there rush the gunman and take him down - even if it meant sacrificing their lives (which they were losing anyway)?
Perhaps in this feminist/feminized world, we've lost the art of raising heroes. It reminds me of an article I wrote for WorldNetDaily after 9/11: Are Our Sons Ready to Roll?
I hope you moms will read it. I hate to say this, but way too often I see moms over-controlling their sons, trying to make them "nice" and wringing all the masculinity out of them.
Moms, your little boys need adventure. They need dirt. They need toy guns and swords. They need to wrestle and inflict pain on each other - because they need to get over any fear of pain that may hold them back from becoming men.
What they don't need is women trying to micro-manage their lives, judging them wrong when they are simply being boys.
Crazy killers are not guys whose mothers respected and let them explore their masculinity. In fact, I would venture a guess that reality may run just the opposite. Moms need to back off and let their boys be boys.
One of Tripp's and my biggest regrets, btw, is that we didn't put our boys in Boy Scouts. Rather than just link you to it, I'll run it next up - I love the pictures. If your little men are still young, you might want to consider Scouts.
And do read Are Our Sons Ready to Roll? because there are some good suggestions in it for those who need some ideas on how to start building boys into heroes.
Posted in Boys, Current Affairs, Mothering | Permalink
Comments
My husband wondered the same thing. "Why didn't some of the men jump him?"
That article was wonderful!
Posted by: Connie | April 22, 2007 4:55 PM
The Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts are two separate orginizations, are they not? I ask because I've been given to understand that the Girl Scouts are quite liberal and feminist anymore and I don't want to be associated with them when my daughter is older. (So far she's our only but she's still a baby!)
Posted by: Katie Gillet | April 22, 2007 5:05 PM
I definitely agree that boys should be raised as you said (allowed to play with guns, wrestle and be themselves).
In the Virgina Tech situation it was more a case of shock and awe. It seemed like there wasn't much of a chance for anyone to race forward as it happened so fast. Unless you are a trained soldier, a person's first reaction is to go for cover and then after a minute or so the hero would get his mind together and be a hero. I don't think there was time in this instance. Do you agree?
Jena
Posted by: Jena | April 22, 2007 7:29 PM
I do agree with you that some of the stories that are being told do not reflect well on the young men of today. Let me share with you something I was told.
Friends of mine have a daughter at Tech. Thankfully Ali did not have classes that morning. Several of her friends did. One of them was shot multiple times while advancing on and trying to stop the person whose name I refuse to mention -- it's been heard enough. The young man who died didn't provide as romantic a story as a professor -- a Holocaust survivor -- blocking a door to let students escape on a day commemorating the Holocaust.
Another point to consider: Would stories of students who fought back help with the push to control guns? I don't think so. Right now having everyone think the students were lambs ready for slaughter only fuels the fire for the MSM stories demanding gun control.
That being said, remember Ali and her friends -- those who survived and those who didn't -- and their families in your prayers please.
Posted by: Cathy | April 22, 2007 7:32 PM
Barbara, I have been thinking these exact same thoughts. As the mom of 5 boys, I have wondered how they would have responded? I pray that I have not hampered them by my fears for their safety, and my personal lack of "manly bravery" (I probably lack womanly bravery...for instance, when it comes to snakes and mice.)
As for the guns and dirt and swords and wrestling...my dh has made sure that was taken care of. :) And I do read them plenty of stories with valiant and heroic action, gore and all! (King Arthur comes to mind...lots of cleaving from the helm to the navel", probably would be censored in most public situations :))
I am sure there were heroic actions attempted that day, and it is an interesting point Jena makes about what the media would report.
As for gun control, why does this only happen in places where guns are banned? The outcome would have been very different if one student or professor had broken that rule and had a gun to take the guy out after he shot the first person. Of course, he'd be going to jail, but he would be a true hero.
And I sure hope my son's professors are carrying weapons.
Thanks for always giving me something to think about!
Kathy
Posted by: discipula | April 22, 2007 8:32 PM
Sigh - I have an emotional and sickening feeling in my gut reading these points. I'm questioning if I have messed up...I'm definitely not the WORST kind of prissy Mom but I definitely strongly urge safe play. And I don't like the boys playing with guns (although I've gotten less freaky about it as I've seen them make a gun out of EVERYTHING regardless of my not ever buying toy ones.) I am VERY VERY fearful of child abductions and sexual abuse so I really, really keep all the kids as close as I can....especially my young boys who are naturally fearless.
And I really don't like the roughhousing they do but I have already consciously tried to permit it some. But how should I respond when they DO get hurt? Ya know what I do?? If the boys (ages 6 & 4) come crying to me about an injury because of their rough-housing, I tell them it's hard for me to feel sorry for them when they were disobeying me by playing so rough in the first place. Should I stop making rough-housing a no-no, therefore allowing it and then making me more sympathetic to their injuries?
Sigh again....this is all very heart-wrenching....I want to do right...
Posted by: Stacy | April 23, 2007 2:09 AM
Speaking of Boy Scouts, I heard that one of the students who was shot in the leg was an Eagle Scout. He quickly tied a tourniquet and saved himself from bleeding to death.
My husband and I were discussing last night the issue of gun control - if students or teachers had been more easily able to carry guns, someone could have stopped the killer much sooner.
Posted by: Becky Miller | April 23, 2007 11:34 AM
