June 19, 2007 11:14 AM
Ten Commandments for parents of kids with special needs
My dear friend Gloria - who wrote A Mother's Reflections on Her Daughter with Down Syndrome for MommyLife on Mother's Day - sent me this this morning.
The Ten Commandments for Parents of Kids with Special Needs
1. Take one day at a time, and take that day positively. You don't have control over the future, but you do have control over today.
2. Never underestimate your child's potential. Allow him, encourage him, expect him to develop to the best of his abilities.
3. Find and allow positive mentors: parents and professionals who can share with you their experience, advice, and support.
4. Provide and be involved with the most appropriate educational and learning environments for your child from infancy on.
5. Keep in mind the feelings and needs of your spouse and your other children. Remind them that this child does not get more of your love just because he gets more of your time.
6. Answer only to your conscience: then you'll be able to answer to your child. You need not justify your actions to your friends or the public.
7. Be honest with your feelings. You can't be a super-parent 24 hours a day. Allow yourself jealousy, anger, pity, frustration, and depression in small amounts whenever necessary.
8. Be kind to yourself. Don't focus continually on what needs to be done. Remember to look at what you have accomplished.
9. Stop and smell the roses. Take advantage of the fact that you have gained a special appreciation for the little miracles in life that others take for granted.
10. Keep and use a sense of humor. Cracking up with laughter can keep you from cracking up from stress.-Author Unknown ..
Thanks, Gloria!
Posted in Disabilities, Down syndrome | Permalink
Comments
i would add to celebrate the normal.
my little man has taught our family to celebrate the littlest and the greatest of things that he does that are normal. the boy has a temper tantrum because he has effectively communicated his wishes to me and i still say "no"; i celebrate that tantrum. he manages to let his cries or shouts to echo through our house with only one functioning vocal cord,; i celebrate asking him to lower the volume.
one day about three years ago a light bulb came on above my head during an especially trying day with him. his moodiness was so normal for a two year old. IT WAS NORMAL! it was a pain in my butt but it was normal, typical and i seriously found myself celebrating.
this is a great list to encourage us. thanks for sharing.
Posted by: laura | June 19, 2007 11:34 AM
Great advice for any mom!
Posted by: Lisa | June 19, 2007 8:44 PM
"6. Answer only to your conscience: then you'll be able to answer to your child. You need not justify your actions to your friends or the public."
This one is really, really, really hard to maintain in the complex,confusing and not-understood world of autism and all of its potential satellite issues. Everyone has either judgment or a miracle "solution" for you.
Posted by: Marian | June 21, 2007 2:47 PM
