September 5, 2008 8:31 AM
Can Sarah Palin have it all?
I was invited to answer this question for the Christian Science Monitor, which published my response yesterday:
Sarah Palin can have it all
by Barbara Curtis
from the September 5, 2008 editionBluemont, Va. - The five children. The newborn diagnosed with Down syndrome. The pregnant daughter. Sarah Palin's life - chock full of challenge - confronts her opposition with some formidable challenges of its own. After decades of pushing equal rights and treatment for women, the Left is backtracking.
Suddenly motherhood - well, at least too much motherhood or too-complicated motherhood - is incompatible with executive responsibility. Fathers with little children or complex family issues - even some who cheated on their wives - have held office without having to justify their continuing careers. Yet women once again face a very different standard.
Who knew that beyond the glass ceiling feminists vowed to shatter there existed another barrier, imposed by feminists themselves? What happened to choice? To having it all? Have we had a paradigm shift since Aug. 29? What's to stop Governor Palin from doing it all?
This debate matters a lot to me. I have 12 children, including four diagnosed with Down syndrome. Three were adopted. I'm a professional writer. And yes, some people wonder how I do it all, or if I'm doing any of it as well as I should.
Read entire article here.
Posted in Big families, Campaign 2008, Mothering | Permalink
Comments
Barbara, that is undoubtedly one of the best articles you've ever written. I hope (though perhaps naively) that the naysayers from both sides of the aisle will hear and understand their hypocrisy. Maybe you might even change some patrios' minds? That might be pushing it too far, though. ;-)
Posted by: Amanda E | September 5, 2008 9:11 AM
I don't think it's a question of whether or not Sarah Palin can have it all. That's not what concerns me and a lot of other people out there. What concerns me is her total lack of qualifications for the job. Face it, if she were a man she would never have been chosen. Isn't that really just reverse discrimination?
I applaud Sarah Palin for her accomplishments and many of the choices she has made. However, I don't think she's ready to be Vice President of the United States. If she is elected, I have no doubt that we'll be able to subsidize her child-rearing needs with plenty of taxpayer dollars.
Posted by: Tracey | September 5, 2008 11:12 AM
Tracey -
Your comment leaves a wide-open trap for Obama supporters:
Isn't it like saying: Is Obama truly qualified to be President? Face it, if he were not black he would never have been chosen.
Posted by: barbara | September 5, 2008 11:17 AM
Barbara, I love this article on Sarah Palin and glad to see that other women out there can relate to her and take a stand to push her forward and into a position she rightfully deserves. I believe she and McCain both can 'shake up Washington' and I'm glad to see both have the guts to say so! As for Palin being able to handle it all - as you said - there are alot of women, single and married, who juggle careers, children, and home responsibilities and it takes a strong women to do all of these things successfully. Palin has a proven record of doing just that! I believe if she were a man, no questions would be asked of this nature. Obama has children, but a WIFE who handles his home affairs. Biden was a widower before he married his current wife. He now has a WIFE to handle his home affairs. Take this into consideration - behind every successful man is a strong woman! That's something you won't hear on the political front!! Enjoyed reading this positive article - thank you! Doreena
Posted by: Doreena | September 5, 2008 11:29 AM
So glad to see you corrected your error, although I believe your racist tendencies are showing.
However, please note that Obama was elected - Palin was selected.
I'm sure this comment won't be posted - I see a real dearth of comments regarding your post. Perhaps it's because you delete the ones that don't praise you or those with which you disagree.
Posted by: Tracey | September 5, 2008 12:09 PM
Wonderful article and I really enjoyed listening to your interview with Josh. I totally agree about each child increasing your capacity to handle more. As a mother of seven, I gradually evolved into the mother I am now. Although I am not the mother of a child with Down syndrome, four of my children have special needs of varying degrees. My son Nolan (born a healthy infant) was abused by his first adoptive family when he was only 9 months old. He lived but he has severe brain damage. I can truly say without a doubt that he has made me not only a better mother but a more caring and compassionate person.
I also have to add, that behind every good woman is a strong man. If Sarah Palin's husband is even half as supportive as mine, she can handle being VP hands down.
Posted by: Michelle | September 5, 2008 12:30 PM
I agree, Sarah Palin can have it all and should not be critisized for wanting to be Vice-President while raising a family along with her husband and family support. I disagree that this is a Left or Right issue. There have certainly been questions about how she will handle the many jobs she has/will have but I don't believe it is the Left that's leading the charge any more than the Right. It's a sexist issue and history proves that both right and left have been guilty of playing that card. By all means shine a spotlight on the issue but don't make it into a liberal versus conservative political issue because it's not.
Posted by: Mel | September 5, 2008 1:30 PM
No one is saying that a woman can't have a demanding job and a family, too. Most woman have no choice. The point that experienced mothers are making is that you can't have it all... all the time. All children, but especially a special needs child, is demanding on both parents. The choice Sara Palin has made is to focus on her career, and I think that says a lot about what makes her tick. Bristol Palin's teenage pregnancy is evidence to me that abstinence only education is not effective in preventing pregnancies. I hope the public tracks this young couple- for five years to see where they are in 2013. Statistics show that teenage pregnancy increases school drop out rates, increases the poverty level, divorce rates, and instances of child abuse and neglect. I'm sure the Palin child will be cared for, but do we want to encourage teenagers who are not in the same socio-economic status to have babies that they can't care for??? As far as a special initiative from the White House on children with disabilities, I can't see either Republican candidate being able to fund any initiative when we are spending $10 billion of borrowed money a month to pay for the Iraq War.
Posted by: Eli | September 5, 2008 2:28 PM
If we're interested in how she'll handle being a mom of five and having a powerful and demanding position...well, let's look at how she's been handling being a mom of five and having a powerful and demanding position. She's been govenor of Alaska for two years. She has an extremely high approval rating and she managed a pregnancy that included an emotional challenge. No one who knows her has come forward saying that she abuses her power by using tax money to pay for nannies or babysitters. The woman fired the governor's chef for cryin' out loud! Yes, VP is going to be an even "bigger" job, but now she will have a supportive husband at home full-time. And two of her children will be adults during her term in office, one in the military and the other beginning her own family. Clearly this is a woman who knows how to multitask, but she's also going to have fewer kids at home and more help.
Posted by: Shannon Miller | September 5, 2008 2:35 PM
Fantastic article! Really well written.
Posted by: Becky Miller | September 5, 2008 2:59 PM
i don't think it is sexist to ASK whether a demanding family situation will detract from the vice president's capacity/energy to do the job ably, regardless of whether the question was (wrongly) not asked when considering the past candidacies of men. Looking at your description of how you manage with dividing yourself between parenting a large family that includes challenging demands and the job of professional writer i am not persuaded to support palin's candidacy. Regardless of the respect i have for parents who love and give to their families, i do not want a vice president that has a "day job" requiring him/her to "work under great pressure and with little sleep" before s/he even begins the job of vice president.
(thanks for being willing to share your own situation in writing about this issue.)
Posted by: walt mcgee | September 5, 2008 4:56 PM
What concerns me is her total lack of qualifications for the job. Face it, if she were a man she would never have been chosen.
I have just three words for you. John Edwards 2004.
Posted by: Amy K. | September 5, 2008 7:26 PM
Tracey,
Good grief! I've read Barbara's blog for a long time and I've never seen where she has written anything that any rational person could consider racist.
You're obviously not a McCain/Palin supporter. That's fine - in the United States we're all entitled to our views and we each get our own vote. However, I challenge you this: rather than tell us why we shouldn't vote for McCain/Palin, tell us who we should vote for and why. Then maybe we can have a worthwhile conversation.
I'm SO tired of Democrats telling me why I shouldn't vote for McCain and Republicans telling me why I shouldn't vote for Obama. I want someone - anyone! - who is willing to have real conversation with me and address the concerns I have about both major party canidates.
Just because I'm not falling all over Obama doesn't mean I'm racist. Just because I'm not falling over McCain doesn't mean I'm either a supporter of patriarchy or a left wing nut.
Posted by: Anna | September 5, 2008 9:01 PM
Coming from a large family, 8 children, I can understand the need and skill of organization, multitasking and family management. But 12 or 8 or 5 doesn't compare with 300 million. If the VP slot were ceremonial (like the Queen of England, and the House of Windsor) it wouldn't be such an issue. But I will point you to of all places Comedy Central's The Daily Show with tapes of commentary by Karl Rove, Bill O'Reilly, others and Sarah Palin herself, in their own words about the issues of experience, out of wedlock birth and sexism.
That the author of this article is the mother of 12 is admirable, but I am sure that family has the financial means to support a family of 12 (adoption unto itself, from what I understand is expensive, and care of 3 downs syndrome children adding to that) but there is no comparision to the demands of administration, state responsibilties and diplomacy skills needed by someone at the highest levels of government with running a family of 12, 5 or even 8 children. Were there not other Republican women who could bring more substance to the table? Being the mayor of a small town of 5,000 and a state with less than 500,000 amounts to some adminstrative experience, but there are some who run school district and universities with more challenges and bigger budgets.
Would Mrs. Palin make a good VP? She presents well, can read script and delivered her speech well. But what are her thoughts on the lower 48, what about international relations? What does she think about Native American rights? Race relations and the changing demographics that will reflect a very different American 20-30 years from now. What about preserving the Constitution and the Bill of Rights? We are enamored by performance, but we must look deeply at the content. Based on what I've seen so far, in my opinion, she is not ready for the national or international stage and has a long way to go.
Posted by: Karol | September 5, 2008 10:54 PM
Barbara, you know I've been reading a while and I too have to say that article was lovely, just lovely!
And isn't it funny how women want CHOICE but egad! Not THAT choice! Great to point the inconsistency out.
I asked my hubby if he'd be a househusband if I became VP. He said he'd be glad to, once the kids were raised. Snicker, snicker. (He knows how hard the Mom job is.)
Posted by: Stretch Mark Mama | September 6, 2008 1:51 AM
But 12 or 8 or 5 doesn't compare with 300 million.
If she's in charge of 300 million, I hardly see how 12 or 8 or 5 more is going to make that much difference.
I don't know how the Kennedy's managed to govern with all those kids. I guess the population wasn't 300 million yet back then. Must be it.
Posted by: Amy K. | September 6, 2008 8:37 AM
But 12 or 8 or 5 doesn't compare with 300 million.
We are not a nation of children who need a mommy - though many people seem to view the government that way.
Posted by: barbara | September 6, 2008 8:54 AM
Nothing in your article qulifies Palin(in any way) to run the United States Government.She could maybe run for "Alaska's Mom of the year", but not for VP, she would make this great country into a joke;a global joke, greater than what Georgie W. has made us into......
It's simply embarrassing.
And did you say Oprah is racist? Where did you get your education? Or is it possible you might be color blind?
Posted by: Iris C. | September 6, 2008 3:41 PM
Iris -
the trouble with drive-by snipers is they read too fast and too little.
I did not say Oprah was racist. I posted that ABC News asked the question.
I graduated from San Francisco State University summa cum laude with a BA in Philosophy, having studied under Angela Davis - you know, the Black Panther famous for the shoot-'em-up at the Marin Civic Center which ended in a judge paralyzed for life.
I am part Native American and besides teaching in inner-city Washington DC, I have adopted children of other races.
Also, I rarely publish comments which are belittling - but I thought maybe more curious minds would be interested in these answers.
Life doesn't always fit neatly into your little boxes.
Posted by: barbara | September 6, 2008 4:03 PM
