December 23, 2008 12:41 PM
Family Update - especially Tripp
Let's just say it's been busy here, with Tripp still mending, the college kids coming and going - mostly going, it seems - visiting friends and moving in various directions with their lives. Benanna (Ben and Anna) went to scout out Philadelphia, where they have decided to locate after their wedding May 22. They found an area they really like and it was wonderful to see Ben's excitement.
Matt is working at Sweetwater Tavern - usually double shifts, so he is gone 12 hours a day. He had a couple of auditions in New York last week - and Zach went with him and they were able to stay overnights at the Pod Hotel which is no frills and affordable.
Sophia is out with friends most of the time. Maddy is singing most of the time. She and Ben will be doing a duet of O Holy Night at Midnight Mass. Midnight Mass is really the central event we are waiting for this year. We have been downsizing Christmas for years and this year it will be very simple: Presents and our special breakfast with Josh and Hattie. Singing carols. And probably Chinese food for dinner - which has been our tradition since I was pregnant with Sophia and on bedrest 19 years ago (See Christmas greetings and thoughs on traditions).
We have continued to be blessed by wonderful dinners several times a week - and so many gifts and so much encouragement. It has been truly humbling and healing in so many ways to feel so loved and cared for. Though I am way behind on individual thank you notes, I wrote a blanket thank you last week and will share it here for anyone who has been part of our ad hoc circle of support:
Dear Brothers and Sisters -I just want you all to know how overwhelmed, humbled and blessed our family has been the past month as so many of you have responded to our family's very unexpected needs as Tripp's knee surgery recovery was intensified by a MRSA infection.
I have blogged about his progress, but most people here probably do not have time to read blogs. So here is an update:
At the point in the saga when you all came in, Tripp had just come home from his fourth hospitalization/surgery in which the knee replacement was removed. He was in great pain and confined to bed except for excruciating trips to the bathroom and once-a-week visits to his doctor - a painful ordeal because of the dirt road we live on. We thanked God that in July we had moved into a rental with a master bedroom on the ground floor. There is even a fireplace with room beside it for a hospital bed, which is where Tripp still spends most of his day.
The object with removing the knee prosthesis was to give his body a better chance to fight the infection as up until then even a PIC line and daily IV antibiotics hadn't accomplished that. The doctors told us the MRSA virus likes to cling to metal - which has proven to be true as after five weeks out from the removal, Tripp's lab work finally shows that his system seems clear of infection.
On Monday he will take his last dose of antibiotics, the PIC line will be removed and we will wait 6-8 weeks monitoring his blood levels to see if the infection returns. If his body is still infection-free and his constitution strong enough (he lost a lot of weight during this ordeal - but thanks to the lovingkindness of the Body of Christ we are fattening him up) - we will start over again in February with installing a new knee.
Until then, Tripp has a straight leg and great instability/vulnerability. He is moving around on crutches and challenging himself with a walk to the mailbox every day. He is doing some limited exercises but there is a lot of atrophy in his other leg after three months of being out of use. The physical therapist says he is doing very well as most people in his position - waiting to start the process over again - would just give up. Tripp hasn't done that.
While I am rejoicing in the feeling of being loved and carried by God through the hands of his people, I am feeling guilty as I have many individual people to thank for helping us through this time. I have stashed so many notes, cards, receipts in a folder and when I look at it I cringe wondering how to even get started. I'm worried there will surely be someone I forgot.
Like the looming bills for copays, this is something I will just have to address later - but with much more joy, to be sure :)
Right now my life is more moment by moment. I am able to do some writing and blogging - which is part of our income and also a creative outlet for me - but I have put some things on the back burner.
I hope you all understand that this is more than a generic thank you. One of the joys of returning to the Catholic Church is to be alive to the life of the senses God has given us and to enjoy the lasting memories created when the senses are involved. As a Montessori teacher, I have preached this to parents for years in terms of learning for children. Now as a Catholic, I understand God's plan in incorporating the sensorial into our worship.
But being helped in tangible ways leaves vivid impressions too, and I treasure the memory of every meal that has been brought to our family, every article of clothing, every encouraging card and contribution. As a little girl, I grew up very, very poor and we didn't receive many gifts. I learned not to expect much from others but to rely on myself.
God is using this episode in the life of our family for many purposes. But for me, it has been healing in a very important and archetypal way. You may have thought you were just helping the Curtis Family through a crisis, but you were really helping to heal my soul.
How could I begin to thank you for that? Please accept these words and tears of gratitude and awe. I have never felt so loved.
Blessings to all,
Barbara
Tripp made a lot of progress last week. On Wednesday night he drove the boys to their basketball practice. We weren't sure he would be able to drive with his left leg sticking out straight because he is so tall, but he managed to get it into the van with him and he was on his way - driving for the first time since 9/22. Thursday he went with Ben and Zach and sat in the van while they picked out a Christmas tree. Sunday he went to Mass for the first time since the knee surgery. It was truly a wonderful moment.
It is a unique Christmas and a memory I will treasure forever. Every Christmas our family watches "It's a Wonderful Life" - this year we lived it. As I shared in a piece published yesterday in the Christian Science Monitor, we lost a lot of things we thought really mattered, but we've gained so much more. My only hope is that by sharing our experience, you might be reminded - no matter your own circumstances - of the things that matter most.
God is great and generous and true - and loves us so much He sent His Son. We love because He's taught us how. The generosity our family has received is a powerful reminder of this.
Blessings and Merry Christmas to all!
Posted in Christmas, Family, My life | Permalink
Comments
I believe that people would not expect thank-you notes so please do not put that burden on yourself. We love you and we know you love us and that is enough.
Posted by: Elissa | December 23, 2008 4:04 PM
Barbara,
Beautiful, heart-felt letter...your gratitude is in every word of it. =) I have never been good at thank you notes ~ and my strong opinion is that the sweet, authentic letter you wrote (even if to everyone at the same time) is sufficient. You have so much on your plate and people know that. Just a thought. Are there "things" you need that we might be able to send your way?
Posted by: Jenny fitzgerald | December 27, 2008 3:53 PM
