June 29, 2009 2:22 PM
Down syndrome: Reflections from men wanted for book
Brand New Man: Reflections on Fatherhood and Down syndromeMany of you who have children with Down syndrome may be familiar with the book Gifts, edited by Mrs. Kathryn Soper.
If you are like me, the stories from all of the mothers out there were inspirational, and more than one has brought me to tears. Knowing that there are others who have walked down the same path before me has been a blessing, especially in the beginning.
One day, I sent Mrs. Soper an email asking whether there were plans for a book that focused more on a father's perspective. Her response was relatively simple: "No.....I hope you'll consider creating the book you'd like to read." After much thought, I've decided to do just that. I am looking for vignettes from fathers, brothers, uncles, grandfathers and self-advocates for "my" book.
The working title is "Brand New Man: Reflections on Fatherhood and Down syndrome". Write about what moves you, what inspires you, what you wished you'd known. I want this book to bring a sense of peace to new fathers who are faced with the unknown, who are questioning God and his infinite wisdom, and I want to reassure them that Down syndrome is just one more way we are all the same and we are all different. People are people first, and my hope is that when this is all said and done, more people embrace this philosophy.
You are welcome to pass this on to anyone who may be interested. If you have a story to tell, please feel free to contact me. Even if you don't, send me an email letting me know what's on your mind. I will endeavor to answer every email promptly, but remember, I am a father and husband first, so it may take a day or two.
Thanks. And I look forward to hearing what you have to say.
Mike Burgess
burge02c(at)duke(dot)edu
The picture is my husband Tripp and our four sons with Down syndrome - Jonny by birth, Jesse and Daniel and Justin by adoption. Forwarding this to him - and our four older sons - now.
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Comments
I am a father of three children who happen to be adopted and have special needs. Our middle child, Maddie, has Down syndrome and I look forward to a book from the fathers perspective. Being the adopted father of a child with special needs I am generally looked at differently than those that have given birth to a child with special needs. In some respects it is different, but in many ways it is not. Yes, my wife and I willing took on this challenge of a life time as we knew that Maddie had Down syndrome before we ever brought her into our home at 3 months of age, I however still deal with the feelings of loss, grief, frustration, love, happiness, and un-ending joy at watching her be amused at things that most people overlook. We have gone through heart surgery and the fear of losing her, and than knowing that she will conquer her world, at her pace and nobody else’s. She teaches me as much as I attempt to teach her. She’ll drive me crazy, but I will enjoy that drive.
[John - I hope you'll consider writing something yourself.]
Posted by: John | June 29, 2009 4:48 PM
What a great idea, I'll see if Francisco feels inspired to share.
Great photo of Tripp and the guys!
Posted by: Leticia Velasquez | June 29, 2009 10:55 PM
