December 5, 2009 10:05 AM
Children's Christmas gifts - choosing the best
Every year readers ask for ideas for enduring, meaningful gifts for their kids at Christmas.
The first thing you need to know is that you don't have to spend a lot to impress a child. The key is understanding the things that bring children joy and that help release their God-given potential. Some of us grew up with parents that understood this. Some did not. Some of us grew up in a home environment rich with resources to stimulate our imagination and creativity. Some did not.
The greatest gift I got from my Montessori training was learning to think outside the box of my own cultural limitations, Maria Montessori spoke of how important it is to "give the child the world" - to expose children to many different experiences so that they are free to explore those that resonate with the individual gifts God has planted in each of them.
Had it not been for this part of my education 40 years ago, I really don't know if my children would be where they are now. For example, it was because of this desire to push my own boundaries that I began to listen to classical music - now documented to have a relationship to developing intelligence in children. Today I have several children who are accomplished singers - because they had a gift, but also because they had early exposure and encouragement.
"Where one or two are gathered, there Mom will give a sermon." :)
Sorry if it seems I'm preaching - I just feel passionate about this. I took my Montessori training in part as a reaction to my own culturally/emotionally/spiritually impoverished background. I wanted to learn how I could do my best to create something better for children. And now my focus is on equipping you.
I truly believe that when we understand our children's needs and provide for them, we will raise children who embrace learning, love our cultural heritage, are independent thinkers, and are passionate about God. Christmas - when we're patterned to spend money for our children - is a great time to ask ourselves some important questions which will help us make wiser decisions.
The forces of consumerism can be very distracting. But whether toys are actually beneficial to children in the long-run - or whether they have what it takes to hold their interest - is difficult for many parents to determine.
When I recommend products at MommyLife, you can be sure that I'm recommending them through the filter of all I've learned as a Montessori teacher and mother of 12. The bottom line for me is steering parents away from expensive items based on passive entertainment and towards classic items that release children's imagination and unlock their own creativity.
More than ever, I am concerned with wise stewardship. Against the background then of the Christmas hype about whatever the hot toys are this year, I just want to suggest more thoughtful, long-term investments - toys you will see passed down through large families and even to the grandchildren eventually.
There are a lot of choices under Barbara's Picks which link to Amazon. For many items, I've also provided explanations of why and how these can benefit your child. Just reading these can provide background so that when you are at a garage sale or second-hand store you will choose wisely.
And as I present suggestions - as in the Music appreciation round-up to follow - keep in mind that while of course I am grateful for the support of this site through your Amazon purchases, I am sticking with my mission statement: to unburden, empower and equip parents - in this case to free you from the commercial forces targeting your gift dollars, to help you think outside the box of your own upbringing, and to help you provide for your children's developmental needs in a way that will release their creative potential and the joy in your home.
I have ordered extensively from Amazon for the past twelve years - not just books and music, but groceries, cleaning supplies, clothing and educational materials. They save me state taxes, gas, and impulse spending - not to mention hours of my time. They deliver FAST - and with a few exceptions FREE if you order over 25. (click SuperSaver shipping when checking out).
If you are still thinking of buying presents for your kids - or maybe even thinking about returning stuff you've bought because there are better choices - it's not too late. You can also pass this on to grandparents who are asking for ideas.
Here are some previous posts which will give you some guidelines and specific ideas:
Keep in mind that these are all based not on entertaining the child, but on releasing his potential to entertain himself:
Children's gifts: Music appreciation
Kid's table and chairs - Montessori, kid-friendly environment
Gift idea: architectural blocks for kids
Montessori at home: best coloring supplies
Get your children gifts that will last - books for Christmas!
Teaching children compassion: book ideas
Classic books and movies for boys (not linked)
Children's puzzles (not linked - but information on how to select and use preschool puzzles for greatest impact)
Pincer grasp - (not specific products, but will help you choose wisely)
Don't forget to check Barbara's Picks in the left sidebar.
Posted in Christmas, Montessori, Preschoolers | Permalink
Comments
Glad you mentioned gifts, I tried to email you but my email is acting up. I tried to use your "tip jar" yesterday to get you something but you don't have a address associated with your list. I didn't know where to send it. I was going to email but as I said, it is acting up. I get mail but can't send anything yet. Hubby is working on that though.
Anyway, thought I would mention this to you.
A reader
Posted by: A reader | December 5, 2009 4:41 PM
Hi Barbara,
I love all your gift and Advent suggestions. Do you have suggestions for older kids? I have 2 daughters 11 and 14. What I find in terms of books is that there is so much trash out there it is hard to find books and music for the older crowd.
I'm sure there are lots of your readers that would love to hear your ideas.
Thanks,
Christina
Posted by: Christina | December 5, 2009 5:44 PM
Barbara, thank you for taking the time to research and post helpful gift ideas for kids. It helps to filter through all the nonsense and find something meaningful.
My oldest is 4 now, and has a wonderfully active imagination. My other girls are 2 and 10 weeks. I'm a stickler for making sure whatever toys or activities we buy have some educational value, but I can't say the same for all the aunts, uncles and grandparents.
Besides the commercialism aspect (does EVERYTHING have to have a cartoon character or movie theme these days?), the sheer volume and frequency of presents from well-meaning relatives cheapens and devalues them, and encourages expectations that we work hard to discourage.
A few weeks ago, after a visit with relatives who spoiled her with presents, my daughter pointed to something in a catalog and told my husband, "Daddy, you buy me that!" I was disgusted. We want our kids to be grateful for what they have and not feel entitled. They know not to ask for anything when we go shopping, but we still didn't realize how much all the gifts from relatives had been undermining the message we've been trying to teach them.
My parents support our efforts and respectfully restrain themselves when it comes to gifts, much as they'd enjoy spoiling the grandkids. My husband's side of the family is less accommodating. Our values are so different from theirs that discussion on this issue has been fruitless (it doesn't help that most of the aunts and uncles don't have kids of their own).
What would you suggest?
Posted by: Rachel | December 6, 2009 3:20 AM
Another great toy is Wedgits. We have two sets, and everyone from the 11 month old to the 8 year old still plays with them. We also purchased the card set, and the older children use them as a sort of puzzle game. How can you build the Wedgit tower that you see on the card?
Posted by: Kelly | December 6, 2009 2:38 PM
I like your ideas. I have an 11 year old son and although he is mostly over his Lego stage he has moved on to Revel air fix. These are model ships, airplanes etc that can be put together and painted. I think they are great for him as he works hard with his hand/eye cordination and he really likes it when his dad or friends help!
Posted by: Ruth MacCarthaigh | December 6, 2009 4:27 PM
