Mommy Life

February 1, 2010 12:37 AM

MommyLife meets the Rebelution

A highlight at tonight's Maddy Sings for Haiti: meeting The Rebelution brothers - Alex and Brett Harris, whose progress Tripp and I have charted for - well ever since they were tiny tots and their dad was speaking at homeschool events in California.

Their ministry - The Rebelution - is one we admire. And were honored when they picked up Maddy on their radar last week.

As former homeschoolers and fellow spiritual travelers, we were blessed to meet face to face tonight and to share a little about who we really are. They are impressive young men - very real and authentic. I hope this is the beginning of a partnership in which we can continue to share in a way that brings glory to God.

One of the things briefly mentioned was the blow-back in the comments at their blog post highlighting Maddy's American Idol audition. I so understand where Maddy's Christian critics are coming from (there were also a couple negative comments at Danielle Bean's post Go, Maddy! I would have been here myself in 1990 when I had a very secure idea of how God wanted his believers to act, dress, sound, behave.

Those days - when I knew even better than God - were so easy. A pastor would say not to watch Beauty and the Beast or Tarzan because they promoted bestiality or E.T. because it offered an alternative Messiah and our family would throw out the offending VHS tapes.

Those days were easy because we never had to think for ourselves or learn to discern God's purpose for our family or our individual lives. And it was certainly easy to judge everyone else according to our ultra-righteous standards.

What a journey it has been since then to learn to behave like a true child of God - totally dependent on His guidance each moment: Where God might ask me to do something outside the accepted "righteous Christian" norm. Where He might want to do something amazing and miraculous which could only happen if I was willing to set aside my own self-righteousness to follow Him - just as He has throughout biblical history.

What I want to say to all those who worry so much about and feel quick to judge people like Maddy and families like ours (although, really, with four kids with Down syndrome, including three adopted I would think we might be given the benefit of a doubt) is this: God has a plan for each of us. Why not trust that those who love Him are obedient and that He knows what he is doing in the lives of other believers whether we understand or not?

The fact is that there are many in the strictest homeschool Christian circles who may be living what they deem "perfect" lives who are completely unable to impact a single soul outside their immediate circle with the Good News of Jesus Christ. They will spend their lives preaching to the choir. And yet they will find much to criticize in individuals like Maddy who bravely venture forth to be authentic messengers for the God they love and lay down their own lives to serve,

Their view is based on legalism and fear - far removed from God as He revealed Himself in the Bible. Think Rahab. Think Esther. Think anyone who obeyed God without question no matter what was asked.

People like Maddy face enough slings and arrows from the secular world without suffering them from insufferably righteous Christian critics. It is so far from the way God has revealed himself - the way in which He lets us know how much He loves us.

You are the light of the world. A city set on a mountain cannot be hidden.

Nor do they light a lamp and then put it under a bushel basket; it is set on a lampstand, where it gives light to all in the house.

Just so, your light must shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your heavenly Father.

~Matthew 5:14-16

For anyone who feels that God can't work through American Idol to accomplish his purposes, please review Maddy's audition and pick up a copy of Roaring Lambs:

There are stories to tell which have to wait until I can tell them. In the meantime, those inclined to judge might pray to be relieved of their heavy and purposeless burden. We can all learn from what God has done in Maddy's life- saving countless babies with Down syndrome from abortion and so far raising $8000. - and awareness - for Haiti relief efforts

While it may be tempting to look up every verse of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" and condemn Maddy for singing just the first, what you need to hear is the story of the mom who went into an emergency labor situation and wrote me that her fear during the ambulance ride was calmed as she heard Maddy's voice singing the chorus she chose.

Truly, God has chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise and I maintain that there is nothing God can't use to further his Gospel for those whose hearts are yielded to His will.

Btw, here is the final verse to Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah, which Maddy sang tonight at her benefit for Haiti:

Posted in Church Issues | Permalink

Comments

Beautiful, Barbara! THANK YOU for that lovely post.

You are one of my heroines.

Posted by: Kathy from Kansas | February 1, 2010 3:36 AM

Thanks for sharing this article. This is such a pervasive problem in Christianity today, but I think you summarized it biblically:

"God has a plan for each of us. Why not trust that those who love Him are obedient and that He knows what he is doing in the lives of other believers whether we understand or not?"

Posted by: Danny Wahlquist | February 1, 2010 7:30 AM

Beautifully said. This needs to go out to several homeschool groups in Central Ohio...and people wonder why others have "strayed" from the church. The Lord sees Maddy's work and her heart for his people. How proud you must be!!

Posted by: Trish Worster | February 1, 2010 7:40 AM

Maddie singing just the first verse reminded me of Paul's preaching in Athens (Acts 17:22ff). He met the Athenians where they were -- with their statue of an "Unknown God" -- and offered them more of the truth. That is the calling of every Christian.

Posted by: Salome Ellen | February 1, 2010 8:37 AM

I met the Harris boys, along with their younger siblings, their parents, and maternal grandmother (who is from Hiroshima) when they were here in Japan to speak at our homeschool conference. I have never been so impressed by two young people as I was with them. What an incredible family!

I am sorry that you have anyone giving you any negativity about this AI opportunity. I think it's wonderful. Your family has such an incredible testimony, and Maddy has a beautiful, God given talent. I am not able to watch AI over here in Japan, but I am following the story here on your blog, and rooting for dear Maddy!

Posted by: Sue | February 1, 2010 8:38 AM

Maddy brought a light and an awareness to a place that otherwise would have been just another reality show. That is doing God's work. Maddy's light is shining into places that most of us will never have the opportunity to go. God gave her her amazing voice to use for His glory, and she is doing just that! How can you see the joy on the faces of those brothers of hers and the way your family was portrayed and not see the hand of God in it?

Posted by: Jennifer | February 1, 2010 8:42 AM

Barbara, I had no idea that there were Christians who were criticizing Maddy. I think that you showed tremendous restraint in this post.

Posted by: Sue from Buffalo | February 1, 2010 8:47 AM

Thank you for this, Barbara. I'm sorry that your family is being judged harshly, and I am grateful for the ways your blog has blessed me as the mother of an only child, in a broken home.
We had never watched one episode of American Idol as we just don't watch much TV, and I didn't know enough about Am.Idol to be interested.
But we did watch Maddy's audition in Boston on YouTube, over and again to hear her beautiful voice, and fell in love with her. My young daughter was very impressed by Maddy's God-given singing talent, and she especially loved hearing/seeing the video of who Maddy is. I filled in a bit more information from the little I know from your blog. Christ's light shone through Maddy's smile and demeanor; there was no denying that.
Anyway, all of this said to let you know that I am so grateful for your blog because you serve as a powerful example and reminder to me of God's mercy, love and faithfulness. God bless you, Maddy, and each member of your beautiful family as you build up His Kingdom on earth.

Posted by: Karen | February 1, 2010 8:50 AM

Katherine LOVES Maddy and has enjoyed watching her audition video several times! (And the rest of us Millers love Maddy too.) We are so proud of her. She is someone I am delighted to have Katherine admire and look up to.

Posted by: Becky Miller | February 1, 2010 8:58 AM

we are called to be salt and light. salt seasons, enhances and preserves. light is not hidden under a bushel - it leads the way for all to see. Maddy is accomplishing both. Blessings and thanks on her, on you and your family.

Posted by: Barb | February 1, 2010 9:49 AM

Barbara,
Keep on truckin' and trustin' in the Lord.
You and your family are beautiful examples of meeting God in the most ordinary and extraordinary situations. You, Maddy and the entire family are a great example. You impress me greatly with how you handle critics. Such grace and ease.

Posted by: LizinD.C. | February 1, 2010 9:55 AM

Barbara, and Maddy too. THIS homeschooling family is so proud of Maddy - so proud of her for giving of herself to raise money for Haiti and also for being willing to go on American Idol. No zingers from this quarter - only support.

This last week, I had a dialogue online with a professor at a christian seminary. He teaches in the doctoral program. He told me that Christians who have large families are selfish. Selfish to the earth (using up carbon, you know) and selfish for not adopting. Well...you guys certainly blow the stereotypes and portray a large family in such a GREAT fashion. I thought that American Idol portrayed your large family in a very positive fashion - even in a time where *we* are not very popular. I tried to converse with this prof. and tell him how children can be raised to be responsible, to be givers rather than takers, how people are valuable. He shut down the conversation. But Maddy's willingness to put herself out there - she's just a great living, singing example. God bless her! :)

Posted by: Holly | February 1, 2010 10:16 AM

Beautifully written with too many high points to mention! Great, great, great advice (again!) Barbara. Have been and still praying for the Curtis family.

Posted by: Jacqueline | February 1, 2010 10:39 AM

Momma:
your post made me cry because I was at the wrong end of such drastic religious righteousness so many times. Being the "pastor's kids" we were expected to behave and live in the way the congregation deemed appropriate. They were all so ready to condemn us and point their fingers at us regarding what we were doing, but rarely did they offer us a shoulder to cry on or a little pat in the back telling us that they believed in us, or that they loved us. And unfortunately my parents never realized that we were individuals who needed to fulfill our own lives, not the church's descriptions of appropriate behavior.

There are so many things I would have loved to do when I was a child; I loved dancing the cultural dances of Mexico. Each state has its own typical dance and I love each one of them; but I was never allowed to join in, because dancing was a sin.

Every year, for the parade celebrating the Mexican Revolution on Nov. 20th. the school organized special dances, perfectly choreographed to showcase the talent of many of my fellow school girls, but I had to sit in the sidelines and watch, crying inside because I wanted to join in, but apparently I would have risked eternal damnation if I did.

Wearing jeans was a sin; cutting my hair was a sin; wearing makeup was a sin; having secular friends was a sin; talking to anyone from another religion was a sin.

I wish everyone who is quick to judge would remember that "it is not what goes in the body, but what comes out of it that corrupts it".

Could it possibly be that what really matters is the INTENTION of the heart?

What glory is there if you keep all the outwardly signs that your are a religiously devout person, if the intention of your heart is to put others down, because they don't do things the way you do?

God does not look at the outside, but at the inside. At the heart.

I wonder what would have happened if you would stopped Matt and Ben, Sophia and Maddy from following their dreams? What gain would there have been if you would tell them to kill and suppress the spirit God created them with, just so they "looked" Christian. What a sad story that would have been.

I'm afraid there are many us us, who sat in a pew for years, slowly dying inside because we were not allowed to blossom into who God created us to be.

In the end, in my not so humble opinion, that would be the worse sin of them all: to live your life fulfilling everyone else's expectation of you, instead of letting your life and the dreams and passions God endowed you with bring a smile to His face.

Posted by: LadyLovas | February 1, 2010 10:53 AM

What glory is there if you keep all the outwardly signs that your are a religiously devout person, if the intention of your heart is to put others down, because they don't do things the way you do?

Well said, LadyLovas!

Barbara, you are such a gifted writer. Great job getting your point across!

Posted by: Kim | February 1, 2010 11:34 AM

Hi Barbara,

Heard a great homily last night.
The main points? Mind your own business. Stop JUDGING. Love from the inside out. Not the outside in! Stop looking at our neighbor and casting out self-righteous thoughts and comments because of what you see. Instead love one another because God sees us very differently then we see each other..

Was Jesus hanging with saints or the sinners? Maddy and her sincerity touched even the icon harden cynicism, Simon Cowell.

Posted by: Jane | February 1, 2010 11:48 AM

Barbara, I had no idea you were under so much criticism. I am sorry to hear that...but I suppose it's par for the course... unfortunately.
I look forward to seeing Maddy's progress on AI... This will be fun :)

Lisa

Posted by: Lisa | February 1, 2010 11:52 AM

Someone once told me, that as a Christian, if I was causing people to make comments and look at what I was doing or saying just becaus I was a Christian, that I must be doing something right...Maddy is beautiful and Jesus shines from her very being. Jesus said we are to be IN the world but OF the world....Weather or not Maddy wins or even gets into the finals. She will be leaving the "FRAGRANCE OF CHRIST" behind and someone will be touch by her Grace and Beauty in Jesus. The hard facts are that "CHRISTIANS SHOOT THEIR OWN" They are so quick to pass judgement and point fingers. That is not how Jesus wants us to live. You all will be in our Prayers and we are anxious to see Maddy....God's Blessing Dear Friends....Much Love Becky

Posted by: Rebecca Wold | February 1, 2010 11:59 AM

I for one had a go get'um mindset when I read about Maddy... "You go show Hollywood what strong, smart, good, young, talented, upandcoming, humble, spirited, homeschooling Christians are made of!" And I don't even like American Idol.

Posted by: april | February 1, 2010 12:12 PM

Hang in there--I'm so sorry that it has to be the "Christians" giving you a hard time. I appreciate your stance on it, since you said that you were like this years ago. Thank you for this post. ~B

Posted by: B | February 1, 2010 12:21 PM

Sorry to hear that you've been experiencing negativity from the ones who should be supporting you. My prayers are with you and your beautiful daughter- may she touch many hearts with her voice!

We don't get Fox in too well where I live (don't have cable and the digital signal cuts out too frequently on that channel to make for good viewing), but saw her audition segment on YouTube. Her voice gave me chills, it was so beautiful.

God bless!

Posted by: Sarah | February 1, 2010 12:41 PM

Barbara,
I am totally unfamiliar with the Christianity you describe in your post. Having been brought up Catholic, where the emphasis is on free will and the beauty of a relationship that is one of obedience from your own heart and soul, I cannot imagine living within someone else's template of perceived devotion. How would Mother Theresa have made out if she built walls to contain her giving spirit, instead of eliminate them, by caring for people of all spiritual devotions.

My favorite prayer has always been to ask God humbly for a chance to be a useful servant to Him. He was listening because years later our son with Down syndrome was born. The thought of having God listen to me and use me in the way He thought best has indeed, humbled me, yet made my spirit soar.

I honestly feel sorry for those who are prevented from experiencing such spiritual joy.

It's hard to be "salt of the earth" when you're kept on the shelf.

I pray that Maddy's journey is one of salt of the earth, light of the world. Nothing will bring her more joy.

Posted by: kelly | February 1, 2010 1:08 PM

Oh, Barbara! What a life you live!

Congratulations to you, Maddy, the rest of your family, and your event team of volunteers on last night's event. I'm sure it was gratifying to be a part of something so worthwhile.

And to get to meet Alex and Brett! Well, that's just like getting desert, too.

I want to highly recommend Alex and Brett's book, Do Hard Things. We gave it to our 15 yr. old daughter as part of her "book bag" for her b'day (we always give our children books for EVERY occasion). At first, she just wasn't too excited about it, but about half way through the book she was exclaiming that we all had to read it. While I still haven't gotten around to reading it, from the many, many things she told me and from the reviews that I read before buying it, the book challenges teens to rise above the mediocrity so prevalent in America's society. After she read the book, sometimes when she and I would walk and she would tell me how she could see the importance of how we had challenged her to do more than average. She was GLAD we had wanted her to work hard.

I'm so glad that Maddy got to meet these impressive young men and that last night was such a success.

I hope you'll be able to share some video footage of the event.

Blessings!

Posted by: von | February 1, 2010 1:48 PM

Barbara,

Wow...that's unexpected! I never would have thought you (& Maddy) would be getting criticism from both sides. I'm an AI fan so I frequent forums (almost always liberal, secular posters) to read about people's impressions of the singers. Having actually met you and heard you speak, I was taken aback by their quick judgment of you (& Maddy) through your blog & activism. It really showed me that a) many people who consider themselves tolerant are small-minded and b) I can't trust people's opinions. Wow, do they completely have you wrong! (One thing that actually made me laugh though-- Some seemed to be completely ignorant that the Montessori way of teaching children is common & accepted--they talked as if it were some kind of brainwashing cult-like way to raise kids!)

I've come across the legalistic Christians you've described--& they are probably who the liberals "think" you are. I hope you both get to continue to prove them wrong.

--Jules

Posted by: Jules | February 1, 2010 2:06 PM

Oh dear, so distressed to hear of the Christian criticism but I guess you can expect just about anything as she progresses. I do pray she can with stand and stand firm in her beliefs while singing her best.

Posted by: Laura | February 1, 2010 2:19 PM

AMEN AND AMEN AND AMEN.

Can Christians just let God be God and give up the job of legalistic border guards? Can Christians --and non-Christians, too-- realize that people's lives and motives are rarely as they see them from the outside, and that people are responsible for their own lives before God? That God's purposes and ways are higher than our own understanding, unique for each person?

Think of so many of our "heroes of the faith" prior to the time they were recognized as heroes, and place them in the context of today's culture and the "standards" some hold. Many would have been criticized to death.

(Incidentally, this crossed my mind a lot when Sarah Palin was first introduced as VP candidate. Christians were full of criticism that she should not be doing that as a mom with a baby. I have NO divine knowledge of what God is doing in her life or of his purposes for her, but good grief! Could we not at least allow for the possibility that God is big enough to order different paths for different people, and that he can handle it??)

Posted by: Marian | February 1, 2010 4:46 PM

We'll DVR Maddy tonight and can't wait to see her. Maybe you can get in touch with Barbara Nicolosi (brnicolosi@aol.com) - her blog is Church of the Masses, which you could also Google. She is very involved in showbiz from the Christian perspective. Barb encourages Christians to be salt and light and leaven for the media. God Bless!!

Posted by: judy | February 2, 2010 12:44 PM

Pro 16:18 Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.

Posted by: Jay | February 2, 2010 2:42 PM

If you're trying to be a prophetic voice, Jay, I can only say you do not know our family at all :)

Might there be some pride in your coming here to exhort someone you don't know?

Posted by: Barbara | February 2, 2010 2:56 PM

I just Googled American Idol and then Fox to find out what time the show airs locally. Since I only watched it once when Maddy was first on, I didn't remember. Could you please put that info. on emails you send about Maddy or in postings about her appearances for those of us who want to watch but can't remember to make a note of the station and times. Thanks.

Posted by: judy | February 2, 2010 7:02 PM

Criticizing in such a way is simply being like the religious leaders in Jesus's time. Those who want to put down all the rules as to how a Christian should look like should rereading how Jesus treated the Pharisees. The religious leaders were so caught up in the laws and rules that they lost sight of who God is.

Posted by: Chantal | February 2, 2010 11:42 PM

Hi Mrs. Curtis,

I'm a member of the Rebelutionary website and have been surprised at some of the comments about Maddy and her appearance on American Idol. Please don't take any of them to heart. Maddy is a beautiful girl and doesn't have anything to be ashamed of.

I myself have struggled in the past with being judgemental, but God is slowly freeing me from that. I think you have done a great job in your response to the criticism.

I wish you and Maddy all of the best,

Noelani

Posted by: Noelani | February 12, 2010 9:50 PM

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