June 28, 2010 4:33 PM
Cyberbullying: whose job? School or parents?
Forwarded to me today from the New York Times:
Online Bullies Pull Schools Into the Fray 
Suzanne DeChillo/The New York TimesPunish him, insisted the parents.
"I said, 'This occurred out of school, on a weekend,' " recalled the principal, Tony Orsini. "We can't discipline him."
Had they contacted the boy's family, he asked.
Too awkward, they replied. The fathers coach sports together.
What about the police, Mr. Orsini asked.
A criminal investigation would be protracted, the parents had decided, its outcome uncertain. They wanted immediate action.
They pleaded: "Help us."
Schools these days are confronted with complex questions on whether and how to deal with cyberbullying, an imprecise label for online activities ranging from barrages of teasing texts to sexually harassing group sites. The extent of the phenomenon is hard to quantify. But one 2010 study by the Cyberbullying Research Center, an organization founded by two criminologists who defined bullying as "willful and repeated harm" inflicted through phones and computers, said one in five middle-school students had been affected.
Affronted by cyberspace's escalation of adolescent viciousness, many parents are looking to schools for justice, protection, even revenge. But many educators feel unprepared or unwilling to be prosecutors and judges.
Read more at the New York Times.
Somehow, this article made me want to scream. Parents get their kids cell phones, pay for text messaging, provide inadequate supervision or safety support, then expect the schools to step in providing discipline for something that doesn't even occur on school time?
More abdicated responsibility. It is becoming more apparent every day that a significant number of parents stopped growing up in their own teen years and are not only unwilling to do the job of being a parent but feel entitled to govenrment intervention in this area too.
Hey, dad - go knock on the cyber bully's door - and take a few of your friends with you. Or call the proper authorities - the police.
Let the schools do what they're supposed to do - teach kids to read and write.
Comments
I just read the article. WOW. I have to agree with you Barbara. What constraints are the parents putting on these technologies? Why do the 12 yr olds have cell phones with text plans and have the freedom to receive and send photos and texts from anyone? I would think the FIRST response from the parent would be to severely limit the use of the item. Make a list of acceptable phone numbers to call, limit the text messages from who and TO who. Also, teach your kids HOW TO BLOCK A NUMBER. I have a lot of sympathy for the school administrators who spent hours and hours dealing with this stuff. Can you imagine how much more could be accomplished if the kids didn't have the technologies in the school? This is crazy. Yet another nail in my faith in public junior high schools. I know some kids come through alright, but I don't want my kids to spend the majority of their time as a 12-14 yr old recovering from other student's text messages. I would rather they (gasp!) LEARN. I think we'll be home thank you very much. Then we have more options about WHO we spend our time with and we can take time to build the coping skills for all the garbage they will see flying all over cyberspace.
One more thing: GO TO THE POLICE if your kid is being harrassed. ISn't that what you would do if it happened in person? Also- the dad who sued the school district over his daughter's awful video: Heaven help you buddy.
Posted by: Imajackson | June 28, 2010 5:27 PM
My gosh .. it would be "uncomfortable" to go to the father of the bully??? Oh no .. it might interfere with their Starbucks visits and Pilates classes.
I totally agree with you .. these parents need to grow spines and defend their child! What kind of message are they sending to their child by not doing so?
They should go to the parents of the offender, and if it doesn't stop, go to the police.
Posted by: Tom J | June 29, 2010 1:02 AM
