March 23, 2011 3:27 PM
Madama Butterfly, Maddy and post-feminist motherhood
Also wanted to mention that last Thursday the Washington National Opera had a special student group rate to see Madama Butterfly. I bought 10 seats for $25. each, which included not only the full opera, but a pre-performance lecture and post-performance Q&A of the artists.
What an incredible opportunity! Maddy and Jonny and I filled our van with other opera enthusiasts and newbies and headed to DC.
The lecture was informative - we learned a lot. The performance was exquisite and deeply moving at the end. And it was great fun to hear from the performers at the Q&A, where we learned that one of the most important parts of an opera singer's regimen is getting plenty of sleep.
My favorite question: An aging feminist stood up and asked Catherine Naglestad, who sang Madama Butterfly, "In light of the fact that this is Women's History Month, how did it feel to play Madama Butterfly?" (the presumption being that she is a victim).
The agenda-loaded question fell like a lead balloon. Naglestad took the microphone and graciously said something like "I am sorry, I honestly did not know and was not thinking about Women's History Month. I was focused on my character, and her capacity for love. She was a passionate woman and she made her choices and I respect that."
Brava! to Nagelstad, too immersed in her music and art to care for political agendas.
I find it so narrow when today's academics try to squeeze classical literature, music or art through the template of today's feminist studies, gay studies, black studies, etc. Political types get so wrapped up in their grievances - like that phrase "When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. They don't seem to grasp that real art transcends time and place.
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Don't know if all my readers know that despite all the different kinds of music Maddy sings - from Ella Fitzgerald to Janis Joplin, from Broadway to Jazz, she has decided to become an opera singer. She has been accepted to Catholic University's School of Music, where she will study vocal performance,
Madama Butterfly was the first opera she ever saw - with me in San Francisco in 2002. You might enjoy the story, which I originally published here 1/27/2005:
Life Lessons From My Kids #1I live with some pretty opinionated individuals. I'm serious. They start young and they say what they think.
I'll never forget some years ago when my youngest daughter Maddy was nine and I took her to the San Francisco Opera to see Madama Butterfly. A nine year old at the opera? Okay, let me back up and explain how that came about:
I grew up not only poor, but suffocated with country music and black velvet paintings. (Don't get me wrong, country music is fine, but music is like the food pyramid -- you need a variety). Though I lived in Washington, D.C., which holds the keys to a kingdom of culture, I always thought plays and concerts and museums were the stuff of which infrequent field trips were made.
All that changed when I had my first child. I wanted so much to give Samantha the world, and the wonderful thing was that in giving it to her, I was finding it myself. Every weekend -- at least when we weren't getting tear-gassed at some demonstration - Samantha and her dad and I would don our tie-dyes and set out early for this or that museum. Then too, I was discovering music. We were into Led Zeppelin and Steve Miller Band, but I was also listening to folk and classical and liking it a lot.
Fast forward twenty years to San Francisco. Now homeschooling, I used that opportunity to teach my kids as much as I could about all the arts. I found sets of kids' art books -- one for each artist -- like What Makes A Monet A Monet?
. I enjoyed them myself!
We went to museums, concerts, watched foreign films. And theater -- our whole family loved musicals and Shakespeare. You know, kids really do like Shakespeare if they have the right exposure. Think of how people who want bilingual kids introduce the second language at an early age. The reason is very Montessori: before the age of six, the child's mind is like a sponge, absorbing everything around it.
Some people underestimate kids' intellectual capacity. For years, Tripp read aloud to the kids every night - always well above their own reading level. He read the Lord of the Rings trilogy, David Copperfield, The Scarlet Pimpernel, all the classics. All this shared culture was a bonding thing for our family.
For a number of years we had enough money to have two season opera passes. Tripp and I might go together or one of us might take one of the kids. This Saturday I started to tell you about, I had decided to take Madeleine. Though she was only nine, Maddy's voice had the power of Ethel Merman, and always on key. I knew she had a gift and I wanted to nurture it. And besides, I love spending time with Maddy because she is the most consistently upbeat and cheerful person I've ever met.
So the opera is splendid and intense. In a nutshell, a turn-of-the-century naval officer stationed in Japan cavalierly marries a young geisha, never intending to stay, though she is so committed she gives up her religion and her family. He returns to America, she bears a son. Simple story, but the music is so compelling, and this opera is unique in being an intimate slice of life, standing on its own without a lot of operatic spectacle and fanfare.
Finally, the officer returns to Japan -- with his American wife. Madame Butterfly agrees to give up her son if the father will come to get him. She sends the boy out to the garden to play, unwraps a dagger, sings (of course), then plunges the dagger into her heart even as you hear the officer calling out her name.
I felt Maddy's hand tense on my arm, as she gasped and said, "Mom, I thought she was going to kill him! Why would she kill herself?" To this day, this is one of Maddy's great puzzles of life - why someone who was wronged would then harm herself.
Yesterday we took Jonny for a haircut and were startled by the beautician's arms which were covered with about 50 precisely designed and painful-looking cuts, not yet healed. I wanted to take her arms and cry with her and take away whatever it was that made her want to hurt herself so.
Maddy and I talked about it over Chinese food afterward as Jonny tried valiantly to master his chopsticks. I'm convinced that no matter how weird things get, this is one little girl with her head on straight.
And I'm a happy mother with Maddy in my life.
And now you know the rest of the story :)
Posted in Family, Feminism, Life Lessons From My Kids, Maddy, Music | Permalink
Comments
Good luck to Maddy in her choice of major. I was a vocal music ed major at Baylor University the first year and a half of my college life and unfortunately burned out in addition to being diagnosed with severe TMJ disorder. It is a very difficult path and I have a great respect for those who have the strength to walk it. Vocal music performance is a strenuous major and really requires more hours than one gets credit for.
Please let Maddy know it's okay to take a couple of "easy" (I call them blowoff) classes each semester to help balance the workload because she will be BUSY!
Most of all, I wish her (and the rest of you all) the best and will keep y'all in my prayers. Good luck and God bless!
Posted by: Courageous Grace | March 23, 2011 6:25 PM
Grace -
Did you miss the post I did for the YouTube "You should take voice lessons" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ib2prWo49Sc
It's really hilarious - someone like you who's been through the life will really appreciate it :)
Posted by: Barbara | March 23, 2011 6:49 PM
That story about Madame Butterfly and the beautician is so hard to read.
You have convinced me. I'm going to take my three youngest and go to the museums and plays, listen to new music, etc.
I took my 12 year old daughter to an opera last year. It was very good for the both of us, so worth the money and the time.
Thank you, Barbara.
Posted by: Sue from Buffalo | March 24, 2011 7:06 AM
